Friday, March 30, 2012

I'm ready

Yes, I'm still ready.  Still waiting.  Still visiting the personal products aisle at Target.  Ugh.

I'm old enough to remember the Broadway musical and subsequent Hollywood movie, Flower Drum Song.  What I remember most is the catchy tune I Enjoy Being a Girl.  I remember it so well, I almost think I must have sung it in the junior high girls' chorus along with I Say a Little Prayer For You and Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head.

Looking over the lyrics to I Enjoy Being a Girl, I'm pretty positive that girl didn't menstruate.  Nowhere does she wax rhapsodic over the thrill of shopping for tampons or the excitement when you realize your period came early on a day when you happened to wear white hot pants.

Just "listen" to her happy little litany of the joys of  having two X chromosomes.

I'm a girl, and by me that's only great!
I am proud that my silhouette is curvy,
That I walk with a sweet and girlish gait
With my hips kind of swivelly and swervy.

I adore being dressed in something frilly
When my date comes to get me at my place.
Out I go with my Joe or John or Billy,
Like a filly who is ready for the race!

When I have a brand new hairdo
With my eyelashes all in curl,
I float as the clouds on air do,
I enjoy being a girl!

When men say I'm cute and funny
And my teeth aren't teeth, but pearl,
I just lap it up like honey
I enjoy being a girl!

I flip when a fellow sends me flowers,
I drool over dresses made of lace,
I talk on the telephone for hours
With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!

I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.

When men say I'm sweet as candy
As around in a dance we whirl,
It goes to my head like brandy,
I enjoy being a girl!

When someone with eyes that smoulder
Says he loves ev'ry silken curl
That falls on my iv'ry shoulder,
I enjoy being a girl!

When I hear the compliment'ry whistle
That greets my bikini by the sea,
I turn and I glower and I bristle,
But I happy to know the whistle's meant for me!

I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.   

Nope, no peppy lyrics about monthly bleeding.  Imagine that. 

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