Thursday, June 20, 2013
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Monday, June 17, 2013
Saturday, June 15, 2013
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Monday, June 3, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Monday, May 27, 2013
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Monday, May 20, 2013
Music Monday
I really like this song, even if I've only heard it in association with a car commercial. Aretha Franklin and Jackie Wilson (and probably others) recorded this a long time ago, but I LOVE this version by Kristina Train. I guess it just connects with the part of me that loves sad, soulful songs.
YouTube is being stupid and won't let me upload the video. : / You'll have to trust me, the song is amazing.
YouTube is being stupid and won't let me upload the video. : / You'll have to trust me, the song is amazing.
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Only God
I saw this on Twitter -- not sure where it came from and I'm too lazy to research and find out. I just thought it was great.
AMEN!
Only GOD can turn
a mess into a message,
a test into a testimony,
a trial into a triumph,
a victim into a victory.
AMEN!
Thursday, May 16, 2013
Monday, May 13, 2013
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Friday, May 3, 2013
Monday, April 29, 2013
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
An odd dream
I dream a fair amount. Sometimes I remember my dreams, but most of the time I don't -- or I remember only bits and pieces of them. There are some dreams that I wish I could hold on to and store away every detail to retrieve whenever I want. Other dreams . . . I can't forget them soon enough.
Last night I had a rather odd dream and, unfortunately, I don't remember too many of the details. There were four people in the dream, but I can only recall three -- my mother, my daughter, E, and me. I have no idea who the fourth person was, but I'm sure that there was someone else sort of hovering in the background.
E and I were sitting together and my mom was across from us, talking on a cell phone. It was obvious from the pauses in the conversation that she was talking to someone. One of us asked her who she was talking to and she said, "My mother." My grandma, my mom's mother, has been dead for almost 25 years.
I'm positive that either E or I asked her how she could talk to grandma on her cell phone, but I don't think she answered that question. All I can remember her saying is that she really needed to get a new battery for her phone, but she was afraid if she took the old battery out and replaced it with a new one, the phone would work differently and she would lose the ability to talk to her mother.
When I woke up, one of my first thoughts was that I would like to have a phone like that. I can remember years ago, when I was first married, my parents would go to Florida for a few weeks in February. They stayed in a mobile home that some friends owned, but, because these friends didn't live in Florida year-round, they didn't bother with the expense to have a landline installed in their home. This was also long enough ago that cell phones were a rarity.
Long distance phone calls were pretty expensive then as well, even with a calling card from one's long distance carrier, so my mom almost never called me while they were gone. She could have gone to a phone booth (they still were plentiful then) but it was a hassle. I would gladly have called her and paid for the charges, but there was no number where I could reach her. At least one year, I must have had an emergency number because I had to call her and tell her that G's father had died very unexpectedly. But usually I didn't have any way to get in touch with her.
I really missed being able to talk to her once or twice a week, and I remember the thought crossed my mind, "so this is what it will be like when my mother is dead and I can't pick up the phone and call her whenever I want. This is what life will be like when I won't ever be able to talk to her again on this earth." Knowing that I will never have a phone like the one my mother had in my dream, I hope I am able to hear my mother's voice, on the phone and in person, for a very long time.
Last night I had a rather odd dream and, unfortunately, I don't remember too many of the details. There were four people in the dream, but I can only recall three -- my mother, my daughter, E, and me. I have no idea who the fourth person was, but I'm sure that there was someone else sort of hovering in the background.
E and I were sitting together and my mom was across from us, talking on a cell phone. It was obvious from the pauses in the conversation that she was talking to someone. One of us asked her who she was talking to and she said, "My mother." My grandma, my mom's mother, has been dead for almost 25 years.
I'm positive that either E or I asked her how she could talk to grandma on her cell phone, but I don't think she answered that question. All I can remember her saying is that she really needed to get a new battery for her phone, but she was afraid if she took the old battery out and replaced it with a new one, the phone would work differently and she would lose the ability to talk to her mother.
When I woke up, one of my first thoughts was that I would like to have a phone like that. I can remember years ago, when I was first married, my parents would go to Florida for a few weeks in February. They stayed in a mobile home that some friends owned, but, because these friends didn't live in Florida year-round, they didn't bother with the expense to have a landline installed in their home. This was also long enough ago that cell phones were a rarity.
Long distance phone calls were pretty expensive then as well, even with a calling card from one's long distance carrier, so my mom almost never called me while they were gone. She could have gone to a phone booth (they still were plentiful then) but it was a hassle. I would gladly have called her and paid for the charges, but there was no number where I could reach her. At least one year, I must have had an emergency number because I had to call her and tell her that G's father had died very unexpectedly. But usually I didn't have any way to get in touch with her.
I really missed being able to talk to her once or twice a week, and I remember the thought crossed my mind, "so this is what it will be like when my mother is dead and I can't pick up the phone and call her whenever I want. This is what life will be like when I won't ever be able to talk to her again on this earth." Knowing that I will never have a phone like the one my mother had in my dream, I hope I am able to hear my mother's voice, on the phone and in person, for a very long time.
Monday, April 22, 2013
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Saturday
Lethargy has set in. I had plenty of things that I could have done today, things that I needed to do. But I didn't do any of them. Not even one.
My procrastination has ensured that tomorrow will be a full day. : /
My procrastination has ensured that tomorrow will be a full day. : /
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Thankful Thursday
It has been quite a week: bombing at the Boston Marathon, suspected pipe bomb at Purdue (it wasn't a bomb), massive fire and devastating explosion at a fertilizer plant in Texas, and torrential rains and flooding in Chicago and the greater metropolitan area. Additionally this week also marks the anniversaries of the Titanic sinking, Columbine shootings, the Oklahoma bombing, the Virginia Tech massacre, the botched rescue at the Branch Davidian complex in Waco, Lincoln's assassination and Hitler's birthday. Not exactly a list of events that makes one thankful.
Still, I am thankful for several things:
Safe travels to and from Iowa City for K and T, even if they didn't get to see Neil deGrasse Tyson
A successful presentation for N to his cohorts and advisers at the VA
Continued progress and healing for AF from injuries sustained in a cycling accident
A time of fun and fellowship at KS's bridal shower
Our sump pump is running -- this means there's water in the crawlspace, but it also means that the sump pump is working to get the water out
GAI's basement only had a little bit of water, even after five inches or so of rain, and the furnace and hot water heater both are still working
The car repairs for the Suburban were less than the mechanic anticipated
Thank you LORD!
Still, I am thankful for several things:
Safe travels to and from Iowa City for K and T, even if they didn't get to see Neil deGrasse Tyson
A successful presentation for N to his cohorts and advisers at the VA
Continued progress and healing for AF from injuries sustained in a cycling accident
A time of fun and fellowship at KS's bridal shower
Our sump pump is running -- this means there's water in the crawlspace, but it also means that the sump pump is working to get the water out
GAI's basement only had a little bit of water, even after five inches or so of rain, and the furnace and hot water heater both are still working
The car repairs for the Suburban were less than the mechanic anticipated
Thank you LORD!
Monday, April 15, 2013
Music Monday
The lyrics don't fit, but the melody and the overall tone of this song capture what I'm feeling on a day that was filled with so much sadness and fear.
So, ignore the words and listen with your heart.
So, ignore the words and listen with your heart.
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Thankful Thursday
I've been praying for a Purdue University student, A, for the past 10 days. My daughter, who's a senior at Purdue, told me about A and the accident he was involved in while riding his bike on campus. The accident was very serious and A was rushed to the hospital with life-threatening injuries. It seemed like he might not survive the incredible trauma that his body (specifically, his brain) had sustained. But, here it is, a week and a half later, and A is making progress, improving a tiny bit every day.
I am so thankful for the thousands of people -- I'm not exaggerating; there are truly thousands of people all around the world who know about this student -- who are praying for A's recovery. And these same people are also praying for his parents, siblings, extended family, friends, doctors, nurses, and other medical professionals who are watching over him and providing excellent medical care. The staff at A's hospital are dedicated to giving all their patients the best care possible, and I'm sure that many of the people on his medical team are also praying for A and his family.
I'm also thankful to God for hearing and answering the prayers of the many prayer warriors who are interceding for A. The Lord has been so faithful to answer even the smallest requests and everyone who is praying is confidently expecting that our prayers for complete healing will be answered in His perfect timing.
I am so thankful for the thousands of people -- I'm not exaggerating; there are truly thousands of people all around the world who know about this student -- who are praying for A's recovery. And these same people are also praying for his parents, siblings, extended family, friends, doctors, nurses, and other medical professionals who are watching over him and providing excellent medical care. The staff at A's hospital are dedicated to giving all their patients the best care possible, and I'm sure that many of the people on his medical team are also praying for A and his family.
I'm also thankful to God for hearing and answering the prayers of the many prayer warriors who are interceding for A. The Lord has been so faithful to answer even the smallest requests and everyone who is praying is confidently expecting that our prayers for complete healing will be answered in His perfect timing.
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Monday, April 8, 2013
Music Monday
I went to a memorial service today. It was a beautiful celebration of a life well-lived to the glory of God. While Mr. H's family and friends are grieving their loss, they are also rejoicing for heaven's gain and praising God for the sure promise of the resurrection.
This was one of the hymns we sang at the service. Mr. H was a veteran and he was born on the 4th of July, so this patriotic hymn was an especially appropriate selection.
This was one of the hymns we sang at the service. Mr. H was a veteran and he was born on the 4th of July, so this patriotic hymn was an especially appropriate selection.
Thursday, April 4, 2013
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Music Monday/Tuesday
I thought of Music Monday yesterday, and then I forgot. That happens a lot these days. : //
This is a fairly old song. I think I heard it when I first started listening to Moody Radio . . . last century. I seem to remember the artist as Rita Baloche, not Michele Pillar, but the song is the same.
I can't even begin to imagine the amazement, fear, and despair of the women when they arrived to find the stone rolled away from the tomb where they had laid Jesus' body only a few days earlier.
Christ is risen! Death and the grave have no power over His resurrection power! Hallelujah!
This is a fairly old song. I think I heard it when I first started listening to Moody Radio . . . last century. I seem to remember the artist as Rita Baloche, not Michele Pillar, but the song is the same.
I can't even begin to imagine the amazement, fear, and despair of the women when they arrived to find the stone rolled away from the tomb where they had laid Jesus' body only a few days earlier.
Christ is risen! Death and the grave have no power over His resurrection power! Hallelujah!
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Easter Sunday
The best part of my day was the first part of my day -- the Easter Sunday service at my church. Every aspect of the worship service was designed to point the congregation to Jesus Christ: Son of God, long-awaited Messiah, and Risen Savior.
While Google chose to highlight Cesar Chavez's 86th birthday today with a coveted Google doodle, more than two billion Christians worldwide celebrated Jesus' resurrection and victory over death as evidenced by the wonder of the empty tomb.
An empty tomb, with the large, heavy stone rolled away from the opening to the tomb . . . now that would have been the perfect doodle for this Easter Sunday.
While Google chose to highlight Cesar Chavez's 86th birthday today with a coveted Google doodle, more than two billion Christians worldwide celebrated Jesus' resurrection and victory over death as evidenced by the wonder of the empty tomb.
An empty tomb, with the large, heavy stone rolled away from the opening to the tomb . . . now that would have been the perfect doodle for this Easter Sunday.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
We dodged a bullet
G had a face-to-face meeting with his boss today. Some of you might be thinking, "So, what's the big deal? Doesn't everyone have these kinds of meetings once a week or so?" Well, G doesn't -- mostly because he works from our home in the western suburbs of Chicago and his boss works from an office in Massachusetts.
When G told me that his boss wanted to have a meeting with him, I asked him when he would be flying to MA. I was really surprised when he said that he was going to meet R at a nearby restaurant at three o'clock this afternoon. Normally G sees his boss once, maybe twice per year, and he had already seen R about two months ago. So it was highly unusual for R to call up this morning and ask if they could get together this afternoon. Who knew that R was in the Chicago area? Not G, that's for sure.
Immediately my radar that seeks out trouble and disaster was on high alert. R claimed that he was in the area to visit some clients. Why wouldn't he ask G to go with him to make these customer calls? What did he really want to talk to about? What if he had come all this way to tell G to his face that he was fired? I really have a talent for jumping to the worst possible, unfounded conclusions.
G left for the meeting and he didn't come back for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. I'm sure you can imagine the thoughts that went through my mind during that time. Fortunately most of my thoughts were directed to God, in prayer. I told Him over and over that I trusted Him and I tried to remember other times when we had faced trials or uncertainty and He had seen us through. I thought of six friends whose husbands/boyfriend had lost their jobs. In the most extreme case it was three years before one of the men found a job, but in every situation, God was faithful to provide for their basic needs. If the worst was to happen, I was confident that God would provide for us as well.
Finally G came home and we talked about what his boss had to say. Thankfully he did not say, "You're fired." He didn't even say that G was on "double secret probation." They talked about some miscommunication that had occurred on both of their parts and how they needed to avoid that going forward. They talked about teamwork and team and individual goals. They talked about a lot of the things they should have talked about two months ago when R gave G a less than stellar performance review. Because of this meeting, G has a much better idea of what his boss expects from him and R has a better idea of how G approaches his work responsibilities and where his talents and passions best fit into the overall mission of the team.
In the end, it didn't take something as horrible as G losing his job for me to see how God is faithful to provide. As I've written this post, I have been struck at how God provided, even in the midst of G's meeting today. The Lord enabled G to calmly discuss an emotional and confrontational issue with his boss. He provided G with the humility to admit to instances where he could have done better and He provided G with the strength of his convictions to respectfully defend himself in instances where he was in the right as to the approach he had taken. Ultimately God provided G with the opportunity to address and resolve a medium-sized issue before it blew up into a super huge conflict.
God is good.
When G told me that his boss wanted to have a meeting with him, I asked him when he would be flying to MA. I was really surprised when he said that he was going to meet R at a nearby restaurant at three o'clock this afternoon. Normally G sees his boss once, maybe twice per year, and he had already seen R about two months ago. So it was highly unusual for R to call up this morning and ask if they could get together this afternoon. Who knew that R was in the Chicago area? Not G, that's for sure.
Immediately my radar that seeks out trouble and disaster was on high alert. R claimed that he was in the area to visit some clients. Why wouldn't he ask G to go with him to make these customer calls? What did he really want to talk to about? What if he had come all this way to tell G to his face that he was fired? I really have a talent for jumping to the worst possible, unfounded conclusions.
G left for the meeting and he didn't come back for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. I'm sure you can imagine the thoughts that went through my mind during that time. Fortunately most of my thoughts were directed to God, in prayer. I told Him over and over that I trusted Him and I tried to remember other times when we had faced trials or uncertainty and He had seen us through. I thought of six friends whose husbands/boyfriend had lost their jobs. In the most extreme case it was three years before one of the men found a job, but in every situation, God was faithful to provide for their basic needs. If the worst was to happen, I was confident that God would provide for us as well.
Finally G came home and we talked about what his boss had to say. Thankfully he did not say, "You're fired." He didn't even say that G was on "double secret probation." They talked about some miscommunication that had occurred on both of their parts and how they needed to avoid that going forward. They talked about teamwork and team and individual goals. They talked about a lot of the things they should have talked about two months ago when R gave G a less than stellar performance review. Because of this meeting, G has a much better idea of what his boss expects from him and R has a better idea of how G approaches his work responsibilities and where his talents and passions best fit into the overall mission of the team.
In the end, it didn't take something as horrible as G losing his job for me to see how God is faithful to provide. As I've written this post, I have been struck at how God provided, even in the midst of G's meeting today. The Lord enabled G to calmly discuss an emotional and confrontational issue with his boss. He provided G with the humility to admit to instances where he could have done better and He provided G with the strength of his convictions to respectfully defend himself in instances where he was in the right as to the approach he had taken. Ultimately God provided G with the opportunity to address and resolve a medium-sized issue before it blew up into a super huge conflict.
God is good.
Monday, March 25, 2013
Music Monday
Tonight a friend texted to say that her father had suffered a massive heart attack. Mr. H is in surgery right now. At 91 years old, I don't know what his prognosis might be, but I do know that he knows and loves the LORD, as does my friend.
This is one of my favorite hymns of comfort. My friend loves classical music and sings in the choir at her church. I would imagine that she knows this hymn and would find it comforting in this uncertain time. I have chosen it as one the hymns I would like to have played at my memorial service. I hope you remember, E.
This is one of my favorite hymns of comfort. My friend loves classical music and sings in the choir at her church. I would imagine that she knows this hymn and would find it comforting in this uncertain time. I have chosen it as one the hymns I would like to have played at my memorial service. I hope you remember, E.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Thankful
And you thought I was only thankful on Thursdays -- ha!
E and N are in West Lafayette after the long drive from Virginia. Tomorrow afternoon N will defend his doctoral dissertation. I know he will make a great presentation and be more than able to answer any questions that his committee will ask.
It has been a long and challenging journey to reach this point -- some students might have been inclined to give up -- but N has persevered and now he is poised to finish strong as he approaches the finish line. I know how proud I am of him and I can only imagine how proud his father must be. I wish his mom was here to express her love and pride and to share in the joy of his accomplishment. Hopefully, at some point, N will be able to reflect on the role his mother played in nurturing and guiding him to this important moment.
So N, I am thankful for you -- for your determination, integrity, scholarship, and faith. I am proud to call you my son-in-law and my friend.
E and N are in West Lafayette after the long drive from Virginia. Tomorrow afternoon N will defend his doctoral dissertation. I know he will make a great presentation and be more than able to answer any questions that his committee will ask.
It has been a long and challenging journey to reach this point -- some students might have been inclined to give up -- but N has persevered and now he is poised to finish strong as he approaches the finish line. I know how proud I am of him and I can only imagine how proud his father must be. I wish his mom was here to express her love and pride and to share in the joy of his accomplishment. Hopefully, at some point, N will be able to reflect on the role his mother played in nurturing and guiding him to this important moment.
So N, I am thankful for you -- for your determination, integrity, scholarship, and faith. I am proud to call you my son-in-law and my friend.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Music Monday
A new music video from Beyonce was leaked recently. The title of her latest, sure to be a hit, song is Bow Down. In the song, Beyonce tells her competition to "Bow down, b*tches." Apparently she wants everyone to know that she's more than just Jay-Z's wife and Blue Ivy's mom -- she's still the great Beyonce (and her alter-ego, Sasha Fierce).
Something, actually lots of things, about the video rubbed me the wrong way. I mean really rubbed me the wrong way -- in much the same was that the older IBM commercials that used the tagline "I Am" bugged me. Beyonce telling everyone to bow down to her seemed to me to be like giving the middle finger to the only one who has the right to demand that mankind bow down to Him in worship and reverence.
Beyonce may think she is the ultimate female artist. She may even think she is the greatest woman/human on the planet. But God's word tells us that the day is coming, and coming soon, when, "at the name of Jesus every knee shall bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." Phil 2:11
When K was a little girl, she loved the woman who sings this song, Twila Paris. Life for K and all of us was a lot simpler then. But then, as now, Jesus is worthy of our worship and our praise, and He is the only one to whom we should bow down.
Something, actually lots of things, about the video rubbed me the wrong way. I mean really rubbed me the wrong way -- in much the same was that the older IBM commercials that used the tagline "I Am" bugged me. Beyonce telling everyone to bow down to her seemed to me to be like giving the middle finger to the only one who has the right to demand that mankind bow down to Him in worship and reverence.
Beyonce may think she is the ultimate female artist. She may even think she is the greatest woman/human on the planet. But God's word tells us that the day is coming, and coming soon, when, "at the name of Jesus every knee shall bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." Phil 2:11
When K was a little girl, she loved the woman who sings this song, Twila Paris. Life for K and all of us was a lot simpler then. But then, as now, Jesus is worthy of our worship and our praise, and He is the only one to whom we should bow down.
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Ugh
Whenever I make the mistake of watching Gypsy Sisters, I feel like I need to wash out my eyes and ears with bleach. Seriously, this show cannot be for real. No way. It is even worse than the proverbial train wreck that you know you shouldn't look at, but somehow you just can't turn away.
I can't imagine that these women don't mind half of America seeing them dressed like hookers and swearing like sailors . . . and that's an insult to hookers and sailors. I'm pretty sure hookers these days are better dressed and even the most hardened sailor couldn't possibly use the F-word as much as these Gypsy sisters do. It amazes me the things that come out of their mouths -- especially with their little, preschool-aged children right in front of them, taking in every filthy, profane word.
Unbelievable. And even more unbelievable? I'm stupid enough to watch this debacle.
Ugh.
I can't imagine that these women don't mind half of America seeing them dressed like hookers and swearing like sailors . . . and that's an insult to hookers and sailors. I'm pretty sure hookers these days are better dressed and even the most hardened sailor couldn't possibly use the F-word as much as these Gypsy sisters do. It amazes me the things that come out of their mouths -- especially with their little, preschool-aged children right in front of them, taking in every filthy, profane word.
Unbelievable. And even more unbelievable? I'm stupid enough to watch this debacle.
Ugh.
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Not feeling it
Next week the NCAA men's basketball tournament -- March Madness -- begins. I'm just not feeling it.
I think mostly my apathy has to do with the fact that Purdue won't be "dancing." But I also think some of my ennui has to do with the change that college basketball has undergone over the years. I'm sure there have always been players who weren't academically qualified to attend college, but someone in admissions bent the rules a little bit so they could get in. Or maybe a few subtle, but crucial, alterations were made to a high school transcript or entrance exam to boost a sub-par GPA. It happens. It's just that now, it seems like it happens all the time, right and left, everywhere you look.
College athletes these days, in the marquee, big moneymaking sports, don't even make much of an attempt to disguise the fact that a year or two at Ole State U is just a speed bump in the road to their professional sports career. One football player at THE Ohio State University actually tweeted that he didn't understand why anyone expected him to attend class. Before his Twitter account was shut down, he tweeted that classes were a waste of time, that that wasn't why he was at OSU (where else?), and that wasn't what "they" were paying him to do. Hello, NCAA Committee on Infractions? Do you still have some hotels in Columbus on speed dial? You might want to come back to the Buckeye State and start another investigation of this stellar institution of higher education.
I guess I'm showing my age when I reminisce about the "old days" when players competed for the love of the sport and the honor of their school, when student athletes were actually students, and when college coaches weren't paid a higher salary than the President of the United States and even some coaches in the professional sports arena.
The big dance starts next week, but I think I'm going to sit this one out.
I think mostly my apathy has to do with the fact that Purdue won't be "dancing." But I also think some of my ennui has to do with the change that college basketball has undergone over the years. I'm sure there have always been players who weren't academically qualified to attend college, but someone in admissions bent the rules a little bit so they could get in. Or maybe a few subtle, but crucial, alterations were made to a high school transcript or entrance exam to boost a sub-par GPA. It happens. It's just that now, it seems like it happens all the time, right and left, everywhere you look.
College athletes these days, in the marquee, big moneymaking sports, don't even make much of an attempt to disguise the fact that a year or two at Ole State U is just a speed bump in the road to their professional sports career. One football player at THE Ohio State University actually tweeted that he didn't understand why anyone expected him to attend class. Before his Twitter account was shut down, he tweeted that classes were a waste of time, that that wasn't why he was at OSU (where else?), and that wasn't what "they" were paying him to do. Hello, NCAA Committee on Infractions? Do you still have some hotels in Columbus on speed dial? You might want to come back to the Buckeye State and start another investigation of this stellar institution of higher education.
I guess I'm showing my age when I reminisce about the "old days" when players competed for the love of the sport and the honor of their school, when student athletes were actually students, and when college coaches weren't paid a higher salary than the President of the United States and even some coaches in the professional sports arena.
The big dance starts next week, but I think I'm going to sit this one out.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Monday, March 11, 2013
Music Monday
MTV used to play this video all the time. H*ll, MTV used to play music videos. That was a long time ago.
Anyway, I think this song is incredibly haunting and the video just adds another layer to the music and lyrics. The guitar is incredible. For some reason the song reminds me of the television show, Twin Peaks. After some research, I discovered Wicked Game was used for another David Lynch production, a movie, Wild at Heart.
I love how the billowing clouds mimic massive waves crashing on a beach. The video was filmed in black and white on a black sand beach in Hawaii. While I wouldn't mind being Helena Christensen on that beach with Chris Isaak, I wouldn't want to have those black grains of sand all over my face and the rest of my body. I guess that, among other reasons, is why I was never a model or music video star. Ha!
There is definitely an overt sexuality (was Christensen a Victoria's Secret model? Yes, she was.) to the video, but that was par for the course when this video was made. Christensen certainly played her role well; her distracted disinterest in Isaak's advances perfectly reflect the unrequited love the song describes. Apparently there is an "original" video that incorporates scenes from Wild at Heart that is very different than this version, which some feel has the vibe of a Calvin Klein commercial. I don't know . . . I think this one is pretty good.
Anyway, I think this song is incredibly haunting and the video just adds another layer to the music and lyrics. The guitar is incredible. For some reason the song reminds me of the television show, Twin Peaks. After some research, I discovered Wicked Game was used for another David Lynch production, a movie, Wild at Heart.
I love how the billowing clouds mimic massive waves crashing on a beach. The video was filmed in black and white on a black sand beach in Hawaii. While I wouldn't mind being Helena Christensen on that beach with Chris Isaak, I wouldn't want to have those black grains of sand all over my face and the rest of my body. I guess that, among other reasons, is why I was never a model or music video star. Ha!
There is definitely an overt sexuality (was Christensen a Victoria's Secret model? Yes, she was.) to the video, but that was par for the course when this video was made. Christensen certainly played her role well; her distracted disinterest in Isaak's advances perfectly reflect the unrequited love the song describes. Apparently there is an "original" video that incorporates scenes from Wild at Heart that is very different than this version, which some feel has the vibe of a Calvin Klein commercial. I don't know . . . I think this one is pretty good.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Have you ever noticed . . .
Have you ever noticed that when you think to yourself, "Hmmm, it's been a really long time since we've had to take the car in for repairs," the very next day, something goes wrong with the car and you're on the phone with the mechanic, begging him to squeeze you in because you can't live without your car? I'm sure you know what I mean and you could share way too many stories about those sorts of not fun coincidences.
I had that experience today, but it didn't involve one of our cars . . . yet. That "lovely" surprise is no doubt waiting for me in the near future. Instead, I was thinking, "Wow, G and I have really been getting along great. I can't remember the last time we were pissy with one another." And then, BAM! We weren't getting along great and we were being pissy.
Why does that have to happen? Is it because I let my guard down? Why did that innocent, fleeting thought lead to war over the rice cooker? In retrospect, why didn't I say, "Sure honey, go ahead and take the rice cooker into the bedroom (the one you use as an office) and pretend that my childhood desk is just like the kitchen countertop. I'm sure the heat and steam won't wreck anything."?
But no. I had to open my mouth and say if he could wait for just a few seconds while I finished chopping up one last onion, he could have the whole counter to himself. Apparently he didn't want the whole counter to himself; he wanted to start the rice and he wanted to start it right NOW. Except that he couldn't, because first he had to go to the garage to find an extension cord. And by the time he found one and stomped back into the house, I had finished chopping the onion and the counter was cleared and ready for the rice cooker. Even then, he began to set up shop in the bedroom, until I made a federal case out of the whole situation and threw the plastic bag of vegetable scraps on the floor and muttered more than a few choice words (ones I've tried fairly hard to avoid saying during Lent).
Eventually he brought the rice cooker back to the kitchen because "You're always right and we always have to do things your way." Uh, no. I'm not always right and we don't always do things my way. But when I am right and your way isn't equally valid, then yes, we are going to do it my way.
So, we had stir fry for dinner -- I prepped and cooked the veggies; all he had to do was start the rice. I thought it was a pretty good meal. I don't know what G thought because, just like when I made stuffed peppers, he didn't say a word about the food. I suppose this time he didn't say anything because he wasn't talking to me; I still don't know what the issue was with the other meal.
For dessert we had cranberry orange scones that G made this afternoon. I thought they were really good and I told him so. He didn't say anything in response or for the rest of the evening. But when he went to bed, he did say goodnight.
We'll see if he's talking to me in the morning. : //
I had that experience today, but it didn't involve one of our cars . . . yet. That "lovely" surprise is no doubt waiting for me in the near future. Instead, I was thinking, "Wow, G and I have really been getting along great. I can't remember the last time we were pissy with one another." And then, BAM! We weren't getting along great and we were being pissy.
Why does that have to happen? Is it because I let my guard down? Why did that innocent, fleeting thought lead to war over the rice cooker? In retrospect, why didn't I say, "Sure honey, go ahead and take the rice cooker into the bedroom (the one you use as an office) and pretend that my childhood desk is just like the kitchen countertop. I'm sure the heat and steam won't wreck anything."?
But no. I had to open my mouth and say if he could wait for just a few seconds while I finished chopping up one last onion, he could have the whole counter to himself. Apparently he didn't want the whole counter to himself; he wanted to start the rice and he wanted to start it right NOW. Except that he couldn't, because first he had to go to the garage to find an extension cord. And by the time he found one and stomped back into the house, I had finished chopping the onion and the counter was cleared and ready for the rice cooker. Even then, he began to set up shop in the bedroom, until I made a federal case out of the whole situation and threw the plastic bag of vegetable scraps on the floor and muttered more than a few choice words (ones I've tried fairly hard to avoid saying during Lent).
Eventually he brought the rice cooker back to the kitchen because "You're always right and we always have to do things your way." Uh, no. I'm not always right and we don't always do things my way. But when I am right and your way isn't equally valid, then yes, we are going to do it my way.
So, we had stir fry for dinner -- I prepped and cooked the veggies; all he had to do was start the rice. I thought it was a pretty good meal. I don't know what G thought because, just like when I made stuffed peppers, he didn't say a word about the food. I suppose this time he didn't say anything because he wasn't talking to me; I still don't know what the issue was with the other meal.
For dessert we had cranberry orange scones that G made this afternoon. I thought they were really good and I told him so. He didn't say anything in response or for the rest of the evening. But when he went to bed, he did say goodnight.
We'll see if he's talking to me in the morning. : //
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Waiting
It's hard to wait. Right now we're in a waiting period.
Waiting for M to hear if she's been accepted to the OT program at UAB.
Waiting to hear what G's doctor has to say about his CT scan
Waiting to see if our "buyers" will be approved for their mortgage.
Waiting to see E and N in West Lafayette -- in less than two weeks!
Waiting for warmer weather.
Waiting for Jesus to return.
Waiting for M to hear if she's been accepted to the OT program at UAB.
Waiting to hear what G's doctor has to say about his CT scan
Waiting to see if our "buyers" will be approved for their mortgage.
Waiting to see E and N in West Lafayette -- in less than two weeks!
Waiting for warmer weather.
Waiting for Jesus to return.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Thankful Thursday
Lots to be thankful for this week!
E started her job on Wednesday. She went for orientation and will finish up with her training on Tuesday next week and then work an event on Thursday. Yay!
M was able to work out a pet care arrangement for her cat while she's gone for Spring Break. She leaves in an hour or so on a twelve hour bus ride to South Carolina. Her cat will be in very capable and loving hands while she's gone.
G received an e-mail report about his CT scan. As best as we can decipher, it seems like the radiologist didn't find anything out of the ordinary. He has an appointment with his doctor on Monday, so we'll know more then.
M should find out in the next day or so if she has been accepted to the OT program at UAB. She is very nervous and, at this point, almost doesn't want to know if the answer is yes or no. I think she is not feeling especially confident about her chances. I'm thankful that M is trying to be realistic, even though I wish she wasn't quite so pessimistic.
My passport came in the mail yesterday!!! I was afraid that because of all the government cutbacks due to the sequestration, my renewal application might be delayed, but apparently I applied enough ahead of the budget cuts and layoffs to be able to avoid an extended waiting period. Today I mailed three color copies of the photo page to the administrator at my parents' church. I have now officially fulfilled all the pre-trip requirements. Yay! My mother will be relieved. : )
E started her job on Wednesday. She went for orientation and will finish up with her training on Tuesday next week and then work an event on Thursday. Yay!
M was able to work out a pet care arrangement for her cat while she's gone for Spring Break. She leaves in an hour or so on a twelve hour bus ride to South Carolina. Her cat will be in very capable and loving hands while she's gone.
G received an e-mail report about his CT scan. As best as we can decipher, it seems like the radiologist didn't find anything out of the ordinary. He has an appointment with his doctor on Monday, so we'll know more then.
M should find out in the next day or so if she has been accepted to the OT program at UAB. She is very nervous and, at this point, almost doesn't want to know if the answer is yes or no. I think she is not feeling especially confident about her chances. I'm thankful that M is trying to be realistic, even though I wish she wasn't quite so pessimistic.
My passport came in the mail yesterday!!! I was afraid that because of all the government cutbacks due to the sequestration, my renewal application might be delayed, but apparently I applied enough ahead of the budget cuts and layoffs to be able to avoid an extended waiting period. Today I mailed three color copies of the photo page to the administrator at my parents' church. I have now officially fulfilled all the pre-trip requirements. Yay! My mother will be relieved. : )
Monday, March 4, 2013
Music Monday
In honor of National Grammar Day, here is a classic from my late childhood.
Schoolhouse Rock rocks!!! : )
Schoolhouse Rock rocks!!! : )
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Speak my language, please!
You might think this is going to be a rant about people who come to the US, legally or illegally, and can't be bothered to learn English. No, this is a different sort of rant. The language I'm referring to in the title is not a language associated with a specific country or ethnic group of people. I'm talking about a love language, as in the five love languages identified by Dr. Gary Chapman.
In Bible translation, the goal is to translate Scripture into the "heart" language of every people group. While some people groups might know another language (like English, French, or Spanish) for the purpose of education, business, or other official transactions, they usually have a heart language that is most familiar and allows them to express themselves most accurately. Their heart language is likely the language they learned to speak as they grew from a baby to a toddler and onward in their childhood homes; it is the language that their parents and grandparents spoke to them; it is a language of love. Translators strive to learn these heart languages so that the love of God's plan for humanity throughout time, as expressed by Jesus' life, death, and resurrection, can be written down for every human to read in a language that will be understood with the greatest clarity. It is no easy task, but it is so very important. In fact, it is a matter of life and death.
Love languages are similar to heart languages. According to Dr. Chapman, everyone has a primary love language that reaches them most deeply. If person A wants to communicate her love to person B, it is best communicated by using the language that resonates most strongly in the heart of person B, the language that person B knows best. Sometimes person A and person B speak the same love language. Lucky them! Communication between them should be fairly easy. Other times person A may have only a limited vocabulary and familiarity with person B's love language. The lack of knowledge about this "foreign" language can limit communication, but with patience on the part of person B and earnest attempts to learn on the part of person A, confidence and fluency can develop.
And then there is yet another possibility -- person A has never even heard of person B's love language and seems uninterested in making any attempt to learn it. This isn't to say that person A doesn't love person B, but it does mean that if person A communicates her love for person B in a language she prefers to speak, her message could fall on deaf ears because person B might not understand a word that person A is saying.
By now you've probably realized a love language doesn't necessarily use actual words. While words are important, actions are a powerful form of communication too, and the majority of the five love languages are predominately non-verbal. Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Gifts, and Quality Time require movement and action. Only one language, Words of Affirmation, most often necessitates vocal communication, although the language can certainly be expressed with written words of affirmation as well.
My primary love language is Words of Affirmation. My husband does not speak WoA. I've known this fact for years, and most of the time, it doesn't bother me. Most of the time. Tonight, it bothered me.
G's love language is Acts of Service. I thought I was speaking AoS today when I spent half the afternoon making a special dinner for us. What I prepared wasn't difficult, but it was time consuming and created a huge mess in the kitchen. I thought G would be pleased, especially since I know he likes this particular entree and it's not one that I make very often. I'll admit I was looking forward to hearing him use words of affirmation as he thanked me for the delicious (it really was delicious) meal that I spent hours fixing. Sad to say, I was disappointed.
G didn't say anything about the meal. Nothing. Nothing complimentary, nothing critical, no "thank you," nothing. I couldn't believe it. I thought about asking him if he liked the meal, but I decided not to bother. In the past when I've debased myself and fished for compliments, I've been let down when his response was a dismissive "It was fine" or "It was okay," or worst of all "Well, I ate it didn't I?"
I would love to hear G speak my primary love language, but sometimes silence is the better option.
In Bible translation, the goal is to translate Scripture into the "heart" language of every people group. While some people groups might know another language (like English, French, or Spanish) for the purpose of education, business, or other official transactions, they usually have a heart language that is most familiar and allows them to express themselves most accurately. Their heart language is likely the language they learned to speak as they grew from a baby to a toddler and onward in their childhood homes; it is the language that their parents and grandparents spoke to them; it is a language of love. Translators strive to learn these heart languages so that the love of God's plan for humanity throughout time, as expressed by Jesus' life, death, and resurrection, can be written down for every human to read in a language that will be understood with the greatest clarity. It is no easy task, but it is so very important. In fact, it is a matter of life and death.
Love languages are similar to heart languages. According to Dr. Chapman, everyone has a primary love language that reaches them most deeply. If person A wants to communicate her love to person B, it is best communicated by using the language that resonates most strongly in the heart of person B, the language that person B knows best. Sometimes person A and person B speak the same love language. Lucky them! Communication between them should be fairly easy. Other times person A may have only a limited vocabulary and familiarity with person B's love language. The lack of knowledge about this "foreign" language can limit communication, but with patience on the part of person B and earnest attempts to learn on the part of person A, confidence and fluency can develop.
And then there is yet another possibility -- person A has never even heard of person B's love language and seems uninterested in making any attempt to learn it. This isn't to say that person A doesn't love person B, but it does mean that if person A communicates her love for person B in a language she prefers to speak, her message could fall on deaf ears because person B might not understand a word that person A is saying.
By now you've probably realized a love language doesn't necessarily use actual words. While words are important, actions are a powerful form of communication too, and the majority of the five love languages are predominately non-verbal. Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Gifts, and Quality Time require movement and action. Only one language, Words of Affirmation, most often necessitates vocal communication, although the language can certainly be expressed with written words of affirmation as well.
My primary love language is Words of Affirmation. My husband does not speak WoA. I've known this fact for years, and most of the time, it doesn't bother me. Most of the time. Tonight, it bothered me.
G's love language is Acts of Service. I thought I was speaking AoS today when I spent half the afternoon making a special dinner for us. What I prepared wasn't difficult, but it was time consuming and created a huge mess in the kitchen. I thought G would be pleased, especially since I know he likes this particular entree and it's not one that I make very often. I'll admit I was looking forward to hearing him use words of affirmation as he thanked me for the delicious (it really was delicious) meal that I spent hours fixing. Sad to say, I was disappointed.
G didn't say anything about the meal. Nothing. Nothing complimentary, nothing critical, no "thank you," nothing. I couldn't believe it. I thought about asking him if he liked the meal, but I decided not to bother. In the past when I've debased myself and fished for compliments, I've been let down when his response was a dismissive "It was fine" or "It was okay," or worst of all "Well, I ate it didn't I?"
I would love to hear G speak my primary love language, but sometimes silence is the better option.
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Thankful Thursday
A nurse from G's doctor's office called today to say that his carotid arteries looked great. I am so thankful that he does not have any blockage in these arteries. A radiologist still needs to look at the rest of the scans from the CT, so we still don't know what might have caused his speech issue and the numbness in his right hand, but at least we've ruled out one possibility.
Monday, February 25, 2013
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Is it spring yet?
Of course not. It's still winter. Still cr*ppy winter.
We got about three inches of snow on Thursday and we're supposed to get more snow next week.
I don't like snow . . . or cold . . . or wind.
Basically, I don't like winter, so hurry up spring!
We got about three inches of snow on Thursday and we're supposed to get more snow next week.
I don't like snow . . . or cold . . . or wind.
Basically, I don't like winter, so hurry up spring!
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Thankful Thursday
I have sooo much to be thankful for this Thursday!
I'm thankful that G was able to quickly get an appointment with his doctor.
I'm thankful that our insurance agreed to authorize the tests that G needs to have.
I'm thankful that G will be able to have the tests in just a few days, on Monday morning.
I'm thankful that M did well on her physics test.
I'm thankful that even though M's cat, Puddles, escaped from the Crew house, he didn't suffer any harm. He stayed close by the house and when M discovered him outside, she was able to quickly scoop him up and get him inside to safety.
I'm thankful that Elizabeth has a job. It's not perfect; it's not her dream job, but it is a job that will give her a chance to make a little money, get out of the house and meet people and make new friends.
I'm thankful for friends and sisters in Christ who lift up my family in prayer.
I'm thankful that G was able to quickly get an appointment with his doctor.
I'm thankful that our insurance agreed to authorize the tests that G needs to have.
I'm thankful that G will be able to have the tests in just a few days, on Monday morning.
I'm thankful that M did well on her physics test.
I'm thankful that even though M's cat, Puddles, escaped from the Crew house, he didn't suffer any harm. He stayed close by the house and when M discovered him outside, she was able to quickly scoop him up and get him inside to safety.
I'm thankful that Elizabeth has a job. It's not perfect; it's not her dream job, but it is a job that will give her a chance to make a little money, get out of the house and meet people and make new friends.
I'm thankful for friends and sisters in Christ who lift up my family in prayer.
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
A Word for Wednesday
This Word for Wednesday comes from Warren Wiersbe (how's that for alliteration?) by way of David Jeremiah. I suppose I could also have titled this post "I heard it on the radio," because I did.
According to Wiersbe, "God balances our lives by giving us enough blessings to keep us happy and enough burdens to keep us humble. If all we had were blessings in our hands, we'd fall right over. So, the Lord balances the blessings in our hands with burdens on our backs. That helps us keep steady. And as we yield to Him, sometimes we can even turn the burdens into blessings."
Dr. Jeremiah went on to say that this God ordained balance of burdens and blessings enable us to stand straight and to be thankful to the Lord for His providence.
I really needed to hear this today. G and I have definitely been blessed by God, and we have also experienced times when we have carried a heavy burden. During the times of blessing, it can be so easy to forget about the burdensome times. So, when God allows a burden to settle upon us, it is often a shock, and the temptation to cry out "Why, Lord?" is great.
But in many ways, burdens can truly be a blessing. Many people say they have never felt nearer to God than they have when they have faced adversity. The apostle James tells us to "draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." James 4:8 God is always with us, but when things are going well, we tend to feel self-sufficient and foolishly think that we don't need to rely on Him. Yet, when things fall apart, we are humbled, and we realize what we've known in our hearts all along -- we can't make our way in this life on our own; we need God!
Every day, but especially right now, this day, G and I need the Lord. We are facing a season of incredible uncertainty like we have never faced before. But God knows what lies ahead and we can trust Him . . . we will trust Him!
I feel that in this trial, God is calling us to a new level of obedience, faith, trust, and reliance on Him. One of the scriptures that I am claiming is 1 Peter 5:6 -- Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
God has chosen to humble us, but in His perfect timing, He will exalt us. As I cast all my anxieties on Him, I can rest in His sovereignty -- without fear, without dismay, because He is my God. He will strengthen me; He will help me, and He will uphold both G and me with His righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
Thanks be to God!
According to Wiersbe, "God balances our lives by giving us enough blessings to keep us happy and enough burdens to keep us humble. If all we had were blessings in our hands, we'd fall right over. So, the Lord balances the blessings in our hands with burdens on our backs. That helps us keep steady. And as we yield to Him, sometimes we can even turn the burdens into blessings."
Dr. Jeremiah went on to say that this God ordained balance of burdens and blessings enable us to stand straight and to be thankful to the Lord for His providence.
I really needed to hear this today. G and I have definitely been blessed by God, and we have also experienced times when we have carried a heavy burden. During the times of blessing, it can be so easy to forget about the burdensome times. So, when God allows a burden to settle upon us, it is often a shock, and the temptation to cry out "Why, Lord?" is great.
But in many ways, burdens can truly be a blessing. Many people say they have never felt nearer to God than they have when they have faced adversity. The apostle James tells us to "draw near to God, and He will draw near to you." James 4:8 God is always with us, but when things are going well, we tend to feel self-sufficient and foolishly think that we don't need to rely on Him. Yet, when things fall apart, we are humbled, and we realize what we've known in our hearts all along -- we can't make our way in this life on our own; we need God!
Every day, but especially right now, this day, G and I need the Lord. We are facing a season of incredible uncertainty like we have never faced before. But God knows what lies ahead and we can trust Him . . . we will trust Him!
I feel that in this trial, God is calling us to a new level of obedience, faith, trust, and reliance on Him. One of the scriptures that I am claiming is 1 Peter 5:6 -- Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
God has chosen to humble us, but in His perfect timing, He will exalt us. As I cast all my anxieties on Him, I can rest in His sovereignty -- without fear, without dismay, because He is my God. He will strengthen me; He will help me, and He will uphold both G and me with His righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
Thanks be to God!
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Taking the first step
Today G and I took the first step toward determining what happened almost two weeks ago.
Monday, February 18, 2013
Music Monday
I love Al Green and I love this song. I wish today's artists were still making music like this.
Saturday, February 16, 2013
So tired
If I've ever been more tired than I am today, I don't remember it. I woke up early to accomplish something I should have done months ago. Truly, months ago.
By mid afternoon, I still felt like I wasn't fully awake, plus I had a toothache and a wicked sinus headache. (I'm sure hoping that the sinus headache is the cause of the toothache.) So, I did what any sensible person would do. I took a nap.
A few hours later, my headache/toothache was gone, but I still felt incredibly tired. I don't know what my problem is.
By mid afternoon, I still felt like I wasn't fully awake, plus I had a toothache and a wicked sinus headache. (I'm sure hoping that the sinus headache is the cause of the toothache.) So, I did what any sensible person would do. I took a nap.
A few hours later, my headache/toothache was gone, but I still felt incredibly tired. I don't know what my problem is.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Monday, February 11, 2013
Saturday, February 9, 2013
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
As if it were yesterday
I had to proofread a paper for M this evening. She had written a response to a documentary on childbirth and midwives that she watched in her Women's Health class.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Friday, February 1, 2013
Home
G got home today a little past 2:30, so now everyone is home where they're supposed to be: G in CS, K in Chicago, E in Virginia, and M in WL. I didn't really breathe a sigh of relief when my family was in their proper places, but I did offer up a Thank you Lord.
I know that accidents happen and disaster may strike at any time and in any place, but I think most people feel as if home is a place of safety, while danger lurks outside those protective walls. Since I can't keep everyone closed up and never let them venture out, I just have to trust that God will keep them safe, and then bless His name when He does.
I know that accidents happen and disaster may strike at any time and in any place, but I think most people feel as if home is a place of safety, while danger lurks outside those protective walls. Since I can't keep everyone closed up and never let them venture out, I just have to trust that God will keep them safe, and then bless His name when He does.
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Thankful Thursday
Today was a big travel day. E and K got up early (3am!) to be ready for a 4am limo ride to the Orlando airport. K had a 7am direct flight to O'Hare. E had to wait a few hours before she flew to Miami and then caught a flight to Greensboro. From there she had a two hour plus drive home to Catawba -- it was a long day for her. Once 30 Rock was over tonight, I bet she went straight to bed!
I am so thankful that E and K had safe travels home from Florida. K said that her flight was pretty turbulent. E had to get the full pat-down from the TSA before she could clear the security check in Orlando. Their travels were not without a little anxiety, but God was faithful to answer my prayers to bring them home safely.
G flies home tomorrow, and I am trusting God to bring him home safe and sound, just as he did our daughters today. In advance, thank you Lord!
I am so thankful that E and K had safe travels home from Florida. K said that her flight was pretty turbulent. E had to get the full pat-down from the TSA before she could clear the security check in Orlando. Their travels were not without a little anxiety, but God was faithful to answer my prayers to bring them home safely.
G flies home tomorrow, and I am trusting God to bring him home safe and sound, just as he did our daughters today. In advance, thank you Lord!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Music Monday
WBS is currently studying 1 John. With all the talk about light, I thought of this song.
(It sort of bugs me that the video creator typed in "suspicious" instead of "suspicions" [he got it right the first time] but that's a small thing. The song is awesome!)
(It sort of bugs me that the video creator typed in "suspicious" instead of "suspicions" [he got it right the first time] but that's a small thing. The song is awesome!)
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Jelly
Three-fifths of my family is in Florida.
G left on Wednesday and both E and K flew to Orlando today. I know that I could have gone if I really wanted to; I wasn't able to justify the expense, especially with the trip my mom and I are taking in June. However, I am so glad that E and K were able to get away for this mini vacation. While I would have loved to have spent time with them in a sunny and warm setting, I think it's maybe even better that they will be able to have some sister time. So, as I read the flurry of excited texts that I've received, I'm trying really hard to not be jelly (M's slang for jealous).
But still . . . I really wish I was in Florida right now too.
G left on Wednesday and both E and K flew to Orlando today. I know that I could have gone if I really wanted to; I wasn't able to justify the expense, especially with the trip my mom and I are taking in June. However, I am so glad that E and K were able to get away for this mini vacation. While I would have loved to have spent time with them in a sunny and warm setting, I think it's maybe even better that they will be able to have some sister time. So, as I read the flurry of excited texts that I've received, I'm trying really hard to not be jelly (M's slang for jealous).
But still . . . I really wish I was in Florida right now too.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Thankful Thursday
M has been sick the past two days -- so sick that she spent most of the day on Wednesday either in bed or in the bathroom. She managed to drag herself to class, but that was about all she could do.
I hate feeling so helpless when she calls me in tears, especially when she can barely summon the energy to talk to me on the phone and all I can do is offer suggestions and support from 180 miles away. When we talked for the final time last night, I told her that I would be praying for her, praying that she would feel better soon. I took my phone to bed with me and, to be honest, I also prayed that she wouldn't call me in the middle of the night. I prayed that she would be able to sleep without having to make a mad dash to the bathroom and that she would be able to sleep without pain.
Today wasn't an easy day for M, but she did go to her classes and she was also able to meet with two students that she's supervising. Finally when she called me this evening, her voice was stronger and she was starting to sound like herself again. The pain and fear was gone and, more than anything, she just sounded tired.
I wish that M didn't have to go through these unexpected and debilitating bouts of sickness. If I could be sick in her place, I would do it. I can only hope that somehow God is using these times of weakness and pain to bring M closer to Him, to show her that His power is made perfect in weakness and remind her that He will never leave her or forsake her.
It would be wonderful if M would never have to deal with this issue again, but, given her past history, that seems unlikely. In this moment, I am so thankful that M is feeling better and I pray with a grateful and trusting heart that the Lord will continue to keep His loving and healing hand upon her.
I hate feeling so helpless when she calls me in tears, especially when she can barely summon the energy to talk to me on the phone and all I can do is offer suggestions and support from 180 miles away. When we talked for the final time last night, I told her that I would be praying for her, praying that she would feel better soon. I took my phone to bed with me and, to be honest, I also prayed that she wouldn't call me in the middle of the night. I prayed that she would be able to sleep without having to make a mad dash to the bathroom and that she would be able to sleep without pain.
Today wasn't an easy day for M, but she did go to her classes and she was also able to meet with two students that she's supervising. Finally when she called me this evening, her voice was stronger and she was starting to sound like herself again. The pain and fear was gone and, more than anything, she just sounded tired.
I wish that M didn't have to go through these unexpected and debilitating bouts of sickness. If I could be sick in her place, I would do it. I can only hope that somehow God is using these times of weakness and pain to bring M closer to Him, to show her that His power is made perfect in weakness and remind her that He will never leave her or forsake her.
It would be wonderful if M would never have to deal with this issue again, but, given her past history, that seems unlikely. In this moment, I am so thankful that M is feeling better and I pray with a grateful and trusting heart that the Lord will continue to keep His loving and healing hand upon her.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
40th anniversary
Today is the 40th anniversary of the Supreme Court decision, Roe v. Wade. It's certainly not an anniversary that I celebrate.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Music Monday
I hadn't heard this song for quite some time, and then one night, when I was coming home late from getting groceries at Meijer, it came on the radio. As I sang along, I had tears running down my cheeks. God knew I needed to hear this song at that particular moment.
LORD, I hope that I always allow you to shine on me and through me!
LORD, I hope that I always allow you to shine on me and through me!
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Feeling guilty
I was a crab this evening.
Maybe it was because I had to be on my best behavior this afternoon. Maybe it was because I am on day 14 of another PFH (Period From Hell). Maybe it's just because I am a not very nice person.
I felt sorry for myself because I needed to go to two stores to return items -- I was tired and my back hurt from having a period for two weeks, plus it was windy and cold; all I wanted to do was sit at the computer and veg.
The first return was a breeze. The second return was easy as well, but it all went south when I asked the woman at Guest Services (ha!) for a price adjustment for the $2.00 I had been overcharged on an item I had purchased the evening before.
It seems so simple. Store T charged me $17.99 for an item that was ticketed at $15.99 on their shelves. Refund me $2.00, less the 5% discount I get because I spend way too freaking much of my husband's hard-earned money at Store T, less the 50 cent store cash register generated coupon I redeemed for the item.
Silly me. Store T's team member informed me she couldn't give me a refund for the overcharge. She asked someone else and they said the same thing. Even though the item was on the shelf for $15.99, the item is listed as $17.99 in their system -- computer trumps customer and/or any semblance of customer service. The employee didn't even believe me that the tag on the shelf said $15.99. Go ahead, call me a liar. The only suggestion the Guest Services (as if!) woman had for me was to go home and get the item and then return it if I didn't want to pay the price they were charging.
Muttering (mostly) to myself, I stormed off to look at men's socks. I couldn't find any socks that I thought G would like, and as I futilely searched, I grew more and more ticked at the lack of customer service and basic respect I had received. D*mnit, I wasn't going to be pushed to the side that easily.
I went back up to Guest Services (what a lie!) and told the woman that I didn't want to be any more disagreeable than I had already been, but I was really not happy with the lack of customer service she had shown me. I asked her if someone would be willing to go look at the shelf to verify that I was only asking for what I was entitled too, nothing more. She obviously wasn't willing to go herself or even pick up the walkie and ask another team member to look for her. I could feel my face growing redder and my blood pressure escalating. Arrrgh.
Just then another team member came into the Guest Services area and my unhelpful associate asked her about my "unreasonable" request. This woman agreed that she could find a way around the pesky computer system. She offered to refund me $17.99, less my 5% Store T loyalty card discount, and less the 50 cent off store-generated coupon I had redeemed last night. Then she would charge me $15.99, less my 5% discount, BUT she could not (would not?) give me the 50 cents off for the coupon I had used last night . . . wait for it . . . because I had used it last night.
How incredibly stupid. If only I had known that I was going to be overcharged, I would have saved my coupon for tonight. I personally have witnessed cashiers overriding the system when coupons won't scan or if the system refuses to acknowledge that the customer has indeed purchased the requisite item to qualify for the price reduction. All this team member needed to do was manually enter a 50 cent store coupon code into the register. But she wouldn't do it. Before I left, felt that I needed to point out to her that I felt it was unfair to penalize me for what was clearly Store T's error. I said, "I hope you can see that all of this has totally negated the benefit of using a coupon." She said she was sorry, but to be honest, I didn't believe her.
So as I left the store, muttering (yes, again) about how unfair Store T was, I managed to dump all of my credit cards, drivers license, insurance cards, and other assorted receipts on the floor in full view of everyone in the check out area. Arrrgh.
Maybe it was because I had to be on my best behavior this afternoon. Maybe it was because I am on day 14 of another PFH (Period From Hell). Maybe it's just because I am a not very nice person.
I felt sorry for myself because I needed to go to two stores to return items -- I was tired and my back hurt from having a period for two weeks, plus it was windy and cold; all I wanted to do was sit at the computer and veg.
The first return was a breeze. The second return was easy as well, but it all went south when I asked the woman at Guest Services (ha!) for a price adjustment for the $2.00 I had been overcharged on an item I had purchased the evening before.
It seems so simple. Store T charged me $17.99 for an item that was ticketed at $15.99 on their shelves. Refund me $2.00, less the 5% discount I get because I spend way too freaking much of my husband's hard-earned money at Store T, less the 50 cent store cash register generated coupon I redeemed for the item.
Silly me. Store T's team member informed me she couldn't give me a refund for the overcharge. She asked someone else and they said the same thing. Even though the item was on the shelf for $15.99, the item is listed as $17.99 in their system -- computer trumps customer and/or any semblance of customer service. The employee didn't even believe me that the tag on the shelf said $15.99. Go ahead, call me a liar. The only suggestion the Guest Services (as if!) woman had for me was to go home and get the item and then return it if I didn't want to pay the price they were charging.
Muttering (mostly) to myself, I stormed off to look at men's socks. I couldn't find any socks that I thought G would like, and as I futilely searched, I grew more and more ticked at the lack of customer service and basic respect I had received. D*mnit, I wasn't going to be pushed to the side that easily.
I went back up to Guest Services (what a lie!) and told the woman that I didn't want to be any more disagreeable than I had already been, but I was really not happy with the lack of customer service she had shown me. I asked her if someone would be willing to go look at the shelf to verify that I was only asking for what I was entitled too, nothing more. She obviously wasn't willing to go herself or even pick up the walkie and ask another team member to look for her. I could feel my face growing redder and my blood pressure escalating. Arrrgh.
Just then another team member came into the Guest Services area and my unhelpful associate asked her about my "unreasonable" request. This woman agreed that she could find a way around the pesky computer system. She offered to refund me $17.99, less my 5% Store T loyalty card discount, and less the 50 cent off store-generated coupon I had redeemed last night. Then she would charge me $15.99, less my 5% discount, BUT she could not (would not?) give me the 50 cents off for the coupon I had used last night . . . wait for it . . . because I had used it last night.
How incredibly stupid. If only I had known that I was going to be overcharged, I would have saved my coupon for tonight. I personally have witnessed cashiers overriding the system when coupons won't scan or if the system refuses to acknowledge that the customer has indeed purchased the requisite item to qualify for the price reduction. All this team member needed to do was manually enter a 50 cent store coupon code into the register. But she wouldn't do it. Before I left, felt that I needed to point out to her that I felt it was unfair to penalize me for what was clearly Store T's error. I said, "I hope you can see that all of this has totally negated the benefit of using a coupon." She said she was sorry, but to be honest, I didn't believe her.
So as I left the store, muttering (yes, again) about how unfair Store T was, I managed to dump all of my credit cards, drivers license, insurance cards, and other assorted receipts on the floor in full view of everyone in the check out area. Arrrgh.
Friday, January 18, 2013
Lifting the Veil
It's Friday, and with a title like "Lifting the Veil" you would think I was going to rag talk about Say Yes to the Dress or one of the other bridal shows I watch. But, you would be wrong. I'm referring to a different veil altogether.
On my way home from Target (yes, Target -- I hadn't been there since last Saturday, almost an entire week!) I heard a well-known radio teacher speaking about Moses. He said that when Moses first came down from meeting God face-to-face on Mt. Sinai, his face glowed with an unearthly light. This was because when Moses was in the presence of God, the glory of God "rubbed" off on him and he retained that shiny glory for awhile even after he rejoined the Israelites. But after awhile, the godly glow began to fade, and Moses started to wear a veil so his fellow Hebrews wouldn't notice that he no longer had a glowing countenance from his encounter with Yahweh.
On my way home from Target (yes, Target -- I hadn't been there since last Saturday, almost an entire week!) I heard a well-known radio teacher speaking about Moses. He said that when Moses first came down from meeting God face-to-face on Mt. Sinai, his face glowed with an unearthly light. This was because when Moses was in the presence of God, the glory of God "rubbed" off on him and he retained that shiny glory for awhile even after he rejoined the Israelites. But after awhile, the godly glow began to fade, and Moses started to wear a veil so his fellow Hebrews wouldn't notice that he no longer had a glowing countenance from his encounter with Yahweh.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Thankful Thursday
Just a few days ago, M went to the convenient care near campus. She had developed a sore that wouldn't heal and was growing bigger. Because of the location of the sore, she was uncomfortable when she erged or rode a stationary bike for Crew practice. Even walking around campus was somewhat painful.
I had encouraged her to consider going to the convenient care when she first told me about her problem, and she finally had to agree that it would be a good idea to see a doctor. In the back of my mind I was worried that she might have a serious infection or, if left untreated, she could develop a serious infection. Still, it was a little bit unnerving when she called to say that the doctor was going to test to make sure she didn't have MRSA.
Yikes! Yes, MRSA had crossed my mind, but I was hoping that the doctor would totally discount that possibility. But those doctors, they don't go through a gazillion years of medical school for nothing -- M's doctor wanted to be thorough. And I'm glad that he was.
I am very thankful that M did not have MRSA. A nurse from the convenient care called to let her know that she should still continue to take the oral and topical antibiotics that had been prescribed, even though she was MRSA-free. Hopefully M's sore will heal quickly and she will be able to get back to practice soon.
I had encouraged her to consider going to the convenient care when she first told me about her problem, and she finally had to agree that it would be a good idea to see a doctor. In the back of my mind I was worried that she might have a serious infection or, if left untreated, she could develop a serious infection. Still, it was a little bit unnerving when she called to say that the doctor was going to test to make sure she didn't have MRSA.
Yikes! Yes, MRSA had crossed my mind, but I was hoping that the doctor would totally discount that possibility. But those doctors, they don't go through a gazillion years of medical school for nothing -- M's doctor wanted to be thorough. And I'm glad that he was.
I am very thankful that M did not have MRSA. A nurse from the convenient care called to let her know that she should still continue to take the oral and topical antibiotics that had been prescribed, even though she was MRSA-free. Hopefully M's sore will heal quickly and she will be able to get back to practice soon.
Monday, January 14, 2013
Sunday, January 13, 2013
A sad realization
Tonight I looked in the mirror and was dismayed to discover that I look uncomfortably like Honey Boo Boo's mother.
Sadly, that discovery did not dissuade me from having a bowl of ice cream with chocolate sauce.
There is no hope for me. : //
Sadly, that discovery did not dissuade me from having a bowl of ice cream with chocolate sauce.
There is no hope for me. : //
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Quote of the Day
"I may be old and overweight but I'm not stupid."
~ Lisa, from the comment board of a fashion blog
I wish I had the nerve to have this quote put on a tee shirt or a button I could wear when I'm out and about. Maybe it would make all the 20-something, anorexic cashiers at Starbucks and elsewhere think before they pull their not so subtle superior attitude and discrimination cr*p on the over 50, plus size women who patronize their business and insure they have a job.
~ Lisa, from the comment board of a fashion blog
I wish I had the nerve to have this quote put on a tee shirt or a button I could wear when I'm out and about. Maybe it would make all the 20-something, anorexic cashiers at Starbucks and elsewhere think before they pull their not so subtle superior attitude and discrimination cr*p on the over 50, plus size women who patronize their business and insure they have a job.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Music Monday
Last night I watched a 2 1/2 hour Eric Clapton concert . . . and I don't really even like Clapton all that much.
I do like Layla, both the original and newer acoustic version. I have heard Clapton play the acoustic version a little slower and more soulfully than he does in this video, but both have the cool syncopation. It sort of makes sense that the faster Layla is from Clapton's youth and the slower Layla is a product of his middle age.
As an interesting side note, one of K's friends had a baby a few months ago and named her Layla after the title of one of Eric Clapton's most famous songs. Pretty cool.
I do like Layla, both the original and newer acoustic version. I have heard Clapton play the acoustic version a little slower and more soulfully than he does in this video, but both have the cool syncopation. It sort of makes sense that the faster Layla is from Clapton's youth and the slower Layla is a product of his middle age.
As an interesting side note, one of K's friends had a baby a few months ago and named her Layla after the title of one of Eric Clapton's most famous songs. Pretty cool.
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Sunday sermon
With the exception of last Sunday, I have spent most Sunday mornings at home, listening to my church's worship service broadcast over the the internet. A few months ago I decided to start taking sermon notes on my computer. I've found that it helps me to focus, rather than being distracted by all the "shiny" things in my family room.
Today the sermon was preached by the president of the Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. The sermon text was Judges 4, which on the face of it might seem like an odd text to choose for the first Sunday of the new year. But Dr. N knows his Bible and he knew what he was doing when he chose this passage.
The central point of the message was "do not hesitate to obey God." Isn't that a great New Year's resolution? Dr. N gave examples from his youth of times when he had hesitated to obey his mother and the consequences that resulted from his hesitation. He said that sometimes he knew ahead of time what the consequence would be, but at other times, he didn't know until it was too late just how much his hesitation would cost him. And so it is when we choose to hesitate in a matter where God has made His will clear.
In Judges 4, Barak knew that God wanted him to act immediately when the prophetess and judge, Deborah, gave him his marching orders to draw out Sisera. But Barak questioned and tested Deborah. Her prophecy had told him exactly what to do and assured him that God had promised to give him victory over his foes if he obeyed. Yet, Barak hesitated before he finally obeyed.
On the day of battle, Barak's men did indeed defeat the mighty army of Sisera, in spite of being outmatched by Sisera's 900 chariots of iron. But Sisera escaped and ran away to the supposed safety of an ally's tent. Barak pursued him and tracked him to the tent. But what did he find when he arrived, expecting to deal the death blow to his enemy? -- Sisera, dead, pinned to the floor of the tent by a tent peg driven completely through his head. And who hammered in that tent peg? It was none other than Jael, the wife of Sisera's ally.
I have often heard the phrase, "Obedience delayed is disobedience." Dr. N didn't say that today, but he did say that when we hesitate (delay) to obey God, He gives the honor that He intended for us to someone else who did not hesitate to obey. Barak missed out on the honor of killing Sisera and instead, that honor went to Jael, a woman. That must have been a double blow to Barak's pride.
I thought this was an excellent sermon. My only quibble was with an aspect of honor (or blessing) that Dr. N touched upon. He didn't specifically say this, but it was implied that obedience should be our immediate response because God will bless us for it. I would respectfully submit that obedience should be our immediate response because God demands it of us and He is supremely right to do so. If God chooses to confer honor or blessing on us for our obedience without hesitation, so be it. If He chooses to do otherwise, so be it. Our obedience to God should not be dependent on what we will get out of it. We should obey God because of who He is -- the great I AM -- and our love for Him and a desire to please Him.
Today the sermon was preached by the president of the Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. The sermon text was Judges 4, which on the face of it might seem like an odd text to choose for the first Sunday of the new year. But Dr. N knows his Bible and he knew what he was doing when he chose this passage.
The central point of the message was "do not hesitate to obey God." Isn't that a great New Year's resolution? Dr. N gave examples from his youth of times when he had hesitated to obey his mother and the consequences that resulted from his hesitation. He said that sometimes he knew ahead of time what the consequence would be, but at other times, he didn't know until it was too late just how much his hesitation would cost him. And so it is when we choose to hesitate in a matter where God has made His will clear.
In Judges 4, Barak knew that God wanted him to act immediately when the prophetess and judge, Deborah, gave him his marching orders to draw out Sisera. But Barak questioned and tested Deborah. Her prophecy had told him exactly what to do and assured him that God had promised to give him victory over his foes if he obeyed. Yet, Barak hesitated before he finally obeyed.
On the day of battle, Barak's men did indeed defeat the mighty army of Sisera, in spite of being outmatched by Sisera's 900 chariots of iron. But Sisera escaped and ran away to the supposed safety of an ally's tent. Barak pursued him and tracked him to the tent. But what did he find when he arrived, expecting to deal the death blow to his enemy? -- Sisera, dead, pinned to the floor of the tent by a tent peg driven completely through his head. And who hammered in that tent peg? It was none other than Jael, the wife of Sisera's ally.
I have often heard the phrase, "Obedience delayed is disobedience." Dr. N didn't say that today, but he did say that when we hesitate (delay) to obey God, He gives the honor that He intended for us to someone else who did not hesitate to obey. Barak missed out on the honor of killing Sisera and instead, that honor went to Jael, a woman. That must have been a double blow to Barak's pride.
I thought this was an excellent sermon. My only quibble was with an aspect of honor (or blessing) that Dr. N touched upon. He didn't specifically say this, but it was implied that obedience should be our immediate response because God will bless us for it. I would respectfully submit that obedience should be our immediate response because God demands it of us and He is supremely right to do so. If God chooses to confer honor or blessing on us for our obedience without hesitation, so be it. If He chooses to do otherwise, so be it. Our obedience to God should not be dependent on what we will get out of it. We should obey God because of who He is -- the great I AM -- and our love for Him and a desire to please Him.
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Quiet
It's quiet at my house. On Wednesday, M went to spend a few days with K, and today she and a roommate are heading back to school.
It's not that it was noisy in our home for the two weeks M was with us. Most of the time she stayed in her room -- she slept A LOT. She also watched a lot of Hulu and stuff on her laptop and talked or texted with her bf. In some ways it was as if she really wasn't even here.
In the mornings she would run with G, take a shower and go back to bed. I usually didn't see her until late afternoon. We went shopping a few times, but that was the extent of our interaction. All in all it was a really weird Christmas break.
I was looking forward to M's time at home because she would be someone for me to talk with . . . except she never really talked to me. The conversations and time together I was anticipating never materialized. Sadly, it seems she is becoming more and more like G: distant, insular, wrapped up in her own interests and concerns. I wonder if she's like this with others, or is it just me?
It's not that it was noisy in our home for the two weeks M was with us. Most of the time she stayed in her room -- she slept A LOT. She also watched a lot of Hulu and stuff on her laptop and talked or texted with her bf. In some ways it was as if she really wasn't even here.
In the mornings she would run with G, take a shower and go back to bed. I usually didn't see her until late afternoon. We went shopping a few times, but that was the extent of our interaction. All in all it was a really weird Christmas break.
I was looking forward to M's time at home because she would be someone for me to talk with . . . except she never really talked to me. The conversations and time together I was anticipating never materialized. Sadly, it seems she is becoming more and more like G: distant, insular, wrapped up in her own interests and concerns. I wonder if she's like this with others, or is it just me?
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Thankful Thursday
First Thankful Thursday of 2013!
I am thankful for:
K's willingness to host her sister and a college roommate for a few days at her apartment in the city.
A lack of snow -- I hate snow.
My family who loves me in spite of my quirks and flaws.
G's optimistic outlook on life and the circumstances we're facing.
My mom's good experience singing with the church choir.
N's fellowship in neuropsychology that will start this fall.
E's good attitude about being unemployed . . . still.
M's ability to move on from disappointment.
One of my goals for 2013 is to be aware each day of the blessings God has given to me and my family. Thankfulness isn't just for Thursdays! : )
I am thankful for:
K's willingness to host her sister and a college roommate for a few days at her apartment in the city.
A lack of snow -- I hate snow.
My family who loves me in spite of my quirks and flaws.
G's optimistic outlook on life and the circumstances we're facing.
My mom's good experience singing with the church choir.
N's fellowship in neuropsychology that will start this fall.
E's good attitude about being unemployed . . . still.
M's ability to move on from disappointment.
One of my goals for 2013 is to be aware each day of the blessings God has given to me and my family. Thankfulness isn't just for Thursdays! : )
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Meh
January 2nd. Two days into 2013; two less than great days in a row.
Today we found out that our "pre-approved" buyers didn't qualify for a mortgage. Gee, what part of pre-approved am I misunderstanding? Our lawyer was pretty mystified. The buyers were getting a $15,000 grant to use as a down payment, plus they were also getting money from family members. We figure that at most, they were probably going to mortgage $60,000 with the price concessions we were giving them. Some people pay more than that for a car they finance for five years, let alone a 30-year home mortgage.
Needless to say, we were pretty disappointed. We had really busted our b*tts before Christmas to get things ready for a closing that never happened. And now we're back to square one with a house we can't afford to maintain and no buyers in sight.
It's hard to not be angry or discouraged. But those feelings are energy-sappers and I barely have any energy as it is. I have to trust that we will find a buyer, trust God that He will work everything out better than we could ever imagine.
Two days into 2013 -- I need to trust God more.
Today we found out that our "pre-approved" buyers didn't qualify for a mortgage. Gee, what part of pre-approved am I misunderstanding? Our lawyer was pretty mystified. The buyers were getting a $15,000 grant to use as a down payment, plus they were also getting money from family members. We figure that at most, they were probably going to mortgage $60,000 with the price concessions we were giving them. Some people pay more than that for a car they finance for five years, let alone a 30-year home mortgage.
Needless to say, we were pretty disappointed. We had really busted our b*tts before Christmas to get things ready for a closing that never happened. And now we're back to square one with a house we can't afford to maintain and no buyers in sight.
It's hard to not be angry or discouraged. But those feelings are energy-sappers and I barely have any energy as it is. I have to trust that we will find a buyer, trust God that He will work everything out better than we could ever imagine.
Two days into 2013 -- I need to trust God more.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Happy New Year
Happy New Year? Not so much. I would like to be able to call a mulligan on today and start over.
We almost made it to the end of M's Christmas break without any major blowups on either of our parts. Almost. But today I said something in "a snotty tone" and "made her feel like a loser" so any warm and fuzzy feelings or happy memories she might have of the two weeks she was home are toast.
The bewildering part for me is that what I said was so neutral (in my opinion) that I was blindsided by her (again, in my opinion) out of proportion response. Honestly, I thought I handled the news that she got a D in physics really well. I didn't even sigh or roll my eyes and I certainly didn't yell at her.
What I did do was ask her what grades she got in her other classes. How could I have been so stupid? She interpreted the question to mean that I thought she had done equally poorly in the remaining five classes. Actually I was fully expecting her to say that she had done really well in the rest of her classes. And she had done well, A's and B's, which is pretty much what I would have predicted. I have no idea how she heard a "tone" that I don't feel I voiced.
Bottom line -- M insisted that I apologize for something that I don't feel I did. My attempts to defend myself were rejected and I was accused of interrupting and disrespecting her.
I am willing to man up and admit when I'm wrong. I am not one of those people who insist they are always right, even when they're wrong *coughMILcough* *coughSILScough*. But I will not apologize for something I did not do. And I don't want to trot out the politicians' disingenuous line -- "I'm sorry if you were offended by something I did/said/thought." How lame.
Tomorrow we take M to K's house to spend a few days before she heads back to school. I wish I could say that it would be nice to have more time together, but in reality, I am not unhappy that she isn't spending her last days of break at home. And when I admit that fact, I feel like the worst mother ever, especially when there are many mothers who would give anything to be able to spend one more day with their child who has died or who is estranged from them or is absent from their life for whatever reason.
I wish that I could do today over. And this time, I would hope to have the good sense to keep my mouth shut. : //
We almost made it to the end of M's Christmas break without any major blowups on either of our parts. Almost. But today I said something in "a snotty tone" and "made her feel like a loser" so any warm and fuzzy feelings or happy memories she might have of the two weeks she was home are toast.
The bewildering part for me is that what I said was so neutral (in my opinion) that I was blindsided by her (again, in my opinion) out of proportion response. Honestly, I thought I handled the news that she got a D in physics really well. I didn't even sigh or roll my eyes and I certainly didn't yell at her.
What I did do was ask her what grades she got in her other classes. How could I have been so stupid? She interpreted the question to mean that I thought she had done equally poorly in the remaining five classes. Actually I was fully expecting her to say that she had done really well in the rest of her classes. And she had done well, A's and B's, which is pretty much what I would have predicted. I have no idea how she heard a "tone" that I don't feel I voiced.
Bottom line -- M insisted that I apologize for something that I don't feel I did. My attempts to defend myself were rejected and I was accused of interrupting and disrespecting her.
I am willing to man up and admit when I'm wrong. I am not one of those people who insist they are always right, even when they're wrong *coughMILcough* *coughSILScough*. But I will not apologize for something I did not do. And I don't want to trot out the politicians' disingenuous line -- "I'm sorry if you were offended by something I did/said/thought." How lame.
Tomorrow we take M to K's house to spend a few days before she heads back to school. I wish I could say that it would be nice to have more time together, but in reality, I am not unhappy that she isn't spending her last days of break at home. And when I admit that fact, I feel like the worst mother ever, especially when there are many mothers who would give anything to be able to spend one more day with their child who has died or who is estranged from them or is absent from their life for whatever reason.
I wish that I could do today over. And this time, I would hope to have the good sense to keep my mouth shut. : //
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