My daughter, E, has assured me that the little memory problems I've experienced are normal for people my age, and that they're not signs of early-onset Alzheimer's.
I am terrified (maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but not by much) of Alzheimer's and dementia in general. We don't have a history of dementia in my close family -- grandparents or parents -- but a few great-aunts have been diagnosed with memory loss that would be consistent with Alzheimer's.
E tells me that it's normal to forget where you've put your keys. What's not normal is when you forget what you use keys for.
I wonder what she would say about what happened to me today.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Friday, March 30, 2012
I'm ready
Yes, I'm still ready. Still waiting. Still visiting the personal products aisle at Target. Ugh.
I'm old enough to remember the Broadway musical and subsequent Hollywood movie, Flower Drum Song. What I remember most is the catchy tune I Enjoy Being a Girl. I remember it so well, I almost think I must have sung it in the junior high girls' chorus along with I Say a Little Prayer For You and Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head.
Looking over the lyrics to I Enjoy Being a Girl, I'm pretty positive that girl didn't menstruate. Nowhere does she wax rhapsodic over the thrill of shopping for tampons or the excitement when you realize your period came early on a day when you happened to wear white hot pants.
Just "listen" to her happy little litany of the joys of having two X chromosomes.
I'm old enough to remember the Broadway musical and subsequent Hollywood movie, Flower Drum Song. What I remember most is the catchy tune I Enjoy Being a Girl. I remember it so well, I almost think I must have sung it in the junior high girls' chorus along with I Say a Little Prayer For You and Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head.
Looking over the lyrics to I Enjoy Being a Girl, I'm pretty positive that girl didn't menstruate. Nowhere does she wax rhapsodic over the thrill of shopping for tampons or the excitement when you realize your period came early on a day when you happened to wear white hot pants.
Just "listen" to her happy little litany of the joys of having two X chromosomes.
I'm a girl, and by me that's only great!
I am proud that my silhouette is curvy,
That I walk with a sweet and girlish gait
With my hips kind of swivelly and swervy.
I adore being dressed in something frilly
When my date comes to get me at my place.
Out I go with my Joe or John or Billy,
Like a filly who is ready for the race!
When I have a brand new hairdo
With my eyelashes all in curl,
I float as the clouds on air do,
I enjoy being a girl!
When men say I'm cute and funny
And my teeth aren't teeth, but pearl,
I just lap it up like honey
I enjoy being a girl!
I flip when a fellow sends me flowers,
I drool over dresses made of lace,
I talk on the telephone for hours
With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
When men say I'm sweet as candy
As around in a dance we whirl,
It goes to my head like brandy,
I enjoy being a girl!
When someone with eyes that smoulder
Says he loves ev'ry silken curl
That falls on my iv'ry shoulder,
I enjoy being a girl!
When I hear the compliment'ry whistle
That greets my bikini by the sea,
I turn and I glower and I bristle,
But I happy to know the whistle's meant for me!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
I am proud that my silhouette is curvy,
That I walk with a sweet and girlish gait
With my hips kind of swivelly and swervy.
I adore being dressed in something frilly
When my date comes to get me at my place.
Out I go with my Joe or John or Billy,
Like a filly who is ready for the race!
When I have a brand new hairdo
With my eyelashes all in curl,
I float as the clouds on air do,
I enjoy being a girl!
When men say I'm cute and funny
And my teeth aren't teeth, but pearl,
I just lap it up like honey
I enjoy being a girl!
I flip when a fellow sends me flowers,
I drool over dresses made of lace,
I talk on the telephone for hours
With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
When men say I'm sweet as candy
As around in a dance we whirl,
It goes to my head like brandy,
I enjoy being a girl!
When someone with eyes that smoulder
Says he loves ev'ry silken curl
That falls on my iv'ry shoulder,
I enjoy being a girl!
When I hear the compliment'ry whistle
That greets my bikini by the sea,
I turn and I glower and I bristle,
But I happy to know the whistle's meant for me!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
Nope, no peppy lyrics about monthly bleeding. Imagine that.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Thankful Thursday
I took a nap this afternoon. In another lifetime, actually less than ten years ago, I napped fairly regularly. But more recently I've tried to limit my naps to an "as needed" basis -- usually when I have a horrible cold or headache.
Today I literally couldn't keep my eyes open. G was getting ready to take the Civic for an oil change and would be gone for at least an hour and I had planned for leftovers for dinner. There wasn't anything that needed my immediate attention, so I decided to take a nap.
Almost two hours later, I woke up feeling refreshed. A nap was just what I needed.
I am thankful for the renewal that sleep brings, whether it's a quick little catnap, a longer midday siesta, or a full night's sleep. God definitely knew what He was doing (doesn't He always?) when He created day and night -- a time for activity and productivity and a time for inactivity and rejuvenation.
Today I literally couldn't keep my eyes open. G was getting ready to take the Civic for an oil change and would be gone for at least an hour and I had planned for leftovers for dinner. There wasn't anything that needed my immediate attention, so I decided to take a nap.
Almost two hours later, I woke up feeling refreshed. A nap was just what I needed.
I am thankful for the renewal that sleep brings, whether it's a quick little catnap, a longer midday siesta, or a full night's sleep. God definitely knew what He was doing (doesn't He always?) when He created day and night -- a time for activity and productivity and a time for inactivity and rejuvenation.
In _____ I trust
Today was a hard day.
Once again I was confronted with and convicted about an area of sin in my life. The fact that I used the word again doesn't say much about me, since it indicates I've been down this road before and somehow still continue to miss the off-ramp.
When am I going to learn to trust -- to really trust -- God?
After everything we went through last year, especially last summer, how could I have reacted the way I did today?
It's more than slightly ironic that US currency bears the phrase In God We Trust, because, in my most honest moments, I have to admit that all too often I place my trust and security in money. My sense of well-being and peace rises and falls with the balance in my checking and savings accounts.
And today trust and peace were nowhere to be found.
Over the past year we've received many, many bills from the Convenient Care, ER, hospital, doctors, and labs. As the bills poured in, the portion we had to pay grew smaller and the amount that insurance paid grew larger. Eventually we got to the point where insurance was covering almost 100% of the charge.
But a few days ago, we received a bill from the hospital for lab work -- $850 worth of lab work -- that insurance refused to cover. I couldn't imagine why our insurance wouldn't pay at least a portion of this bill. I also couldn't remember having incurred this particular charge. I was certain that all of our medical expenses were submitted before the end of 2011. This charge was for January 3, 2012 -- a new billing year and, worse yet, a new insurance company.
G called the hospital and was able to determine that they only had information for our old insurance. He gave them our new info and they said they would resubmit the claim. The whole time he was patiently on the phone with a very patient billing representative, I was raving like a maniac in the background. I kept hissing at him that the charge had to be for a 2011 procedure that the old insurance needed to honor -- no matter whether the charges were submitted in '11 or '12.
Honestly I was convinced that the charges had been posted to our account in error. The billing employee said the lab work was coded to M's gastroenterologist. M had lab work done prior to an appointment with Dr. Z on 12/21, but I couldn't remember anything more after her appointment.
When G got off the phone with the hospital, I called the billing department for Dr. Z. The woman I talked with was very nice and assured me that we had a zero balance with their office. She couldn't find anything on her end that would indicate outstanding charges for lab work. So obviously, the problem was with the hospital's record keeping.
This time I called the hospital. I don't think I spoke with the same person that G did, but she was pleasant and patient while I recounted, amazingly, in a reasoned and rational manner, my confusion concerning this huge lab charge. The woman (wisely) listened as I explained my problem. She may have asked a few questions, but mostly she listened.
As I talked to her, a nagging possibility began to work its way to the front of my brain. Had Dr. Z given M an order for more lab work to be completed before she returned to Purdue for spring semester? I asked the hospital billing rep if she could hold for a moment. Then I asked G if he had possibly taken M to the convenient care for blood work shortly after New Year's. He thought for a moment and then admitted he was pretty sure that he had. By this point, I was pretty sure that he had also.
Before M's pre-Christmas appointment, I took her to a small lab for her blood draw. We ended up waiting a long time and M had complained. Based on the results from that workup and M's conversation with Dr. Z, he asked her to have more lab work done before she went back to school. M said she wouldn't go back to the "slow" lab, so G took her to the convenient care instead. Somehow both G and I had forgotten all about that procedure.
I returned to the phone and apologized to the woman at the hospital for the confusion on our end, made some lame joke about needing to have better communication in my home, thanked her for her time and patience, and then hung up the phone.
Unfortunately all of the patience and reasonableness that I had been able to extend to the billing representatives at the the doctor's office and the hospital vanished when I got off the phone and turned to my husband. I didn't scream at G and I wasn't angry with him, but I was angry and frustrated with the insurance situation. I ranted about how unfair it was that this charge fell in a new billing year and with a new company. I complained about the outrageous cost of health care in general and these lab charges in particular. I swore and took God's name in vain. Then I broke down sobbing that there was no way we would be able to pay the entire amount of the bill (because a new insurance company wasn't going to understand, wouldn't care, and wouldn't pay for what they probably thought were just some random, out-of-the blue tests that M had done for the heck of it). And finally I wailed that because of all of the above, we were going to be broke and penniless.
Once again I was confronted with and convicted about an area of sin in my life. The fact that I used the word again doesn't say much about me, since it indicates I've been down this road before and somehow still continue to miss the off-ramp.
When am I going to learn to trust -- to really trust -- God?
After everything we went through last year, especially last summer, how could I have reacted the way I did today?
It's more than slightly ironic that US currency bears the phrase In God We Trust, because, in my most honest moments, I have to admit that all too often I place my trust and security in money. My sense of well-being and peace rises and falls with the balance in my checking and savings accounts.
And today trust and peace were nowhere to be found.
Over the past year we've received many, many bills from the Convenient Care, ER, hospital, doctors, and labs. As the bills poured in, the portion we had to pay grew smaller and the amount that insurance paid grew larger. Eventually we got to the point where insurance was covering almost 100% of the charge.
But a few days ago, we received a bill from the hospital for lab work -- $850 worth of lab work -- that insurance refused to cover. I couldn't imagine why our insurance wouldn't pay at least a portion of this bill. I also couldn't remember having incurred this particular charge. I was certain that all of our medical expenses were submitted before the end of 2011. This charge was for January 3, 2012 -- a new billing year and, worse yet, a new insurance company.
G called the hospital and was able to determine that they only had information for our old insurance. He gave them our new info and they said they would resubmit the claim. The whole time he was patiently on the phone with a very patient billing representative, I was raving like a maniac in the background. I kept hissing at him that the charge had to be for a 2011 procedure that the old insurance needed to honor -- no matter whether the charges were submitted in '11 or '12.
Honestly I was convinced that the charges had been posted to our account in error. The billing employee said the lab work was coded to M's gastroenterologist. M had lab work done prior to an appointment with Dr. Z on 12/21, but I couldn't remember anything more after her appointment.
When G got off the phone with the hospital, I called the billing department for Dr. Z. The woman I talked with was very nice and assured me that we had a zero balance with their office. She couldn't find anything on her end that would indicate outstanding charges for lab work. So obviously, the problem was with the hospital's record keeping.
This time I called the hospital. I don't think I spoke with the same person that G did, but she was pleasant and patient while I recounted, amazingly, in a reasoned and rational manner, my confusion concerning this huge lab charge. The woman (wisely) listened as I explained my problem. She may have asked a few questions, but mostly she listened.
As I talked to her, a nagging possibility began to work its way to the front of my brain. Had Dr. Z given M an order for more lab work to be completed before she returned to Purdue for spring semester? I asked the hospital billing rep if she could hold for a moment. Then I asked G if he had possibly taken M to the convenient care for blood work shortly after New Year's. He thought for a moment and then admitted he was pretty sure that he had. By this point, I was pretty sure that he had also.
Before M's pre-Christmas appointment, I took her to a small lab for her blood draw. We ended up waiting a long time and M had complained. Based on the results from that workup and M's conversation with Dr. Z, he asked her to have more lab work done before she went back to school. M said she wouldn't go back to the "slow" lab, so G took her to the convenient care instead. Somehow both G and I had forgotten all about that procedure.
I returned to the phone and apologized to the woman at the hospital for the confusion on our end, made some lame joke about needing to have better communication in my home, thanked her for her time and patience, and then hung up the phone.
Unfortunately all of the patience and reasonableness that I had been able to extend to the billing representatives at the the doctor's office and the hospital vanished when I got off the phone and turned to my husband. I didn't scream at G and I wasn't angry with him, but I was angry and frustrated with the insurance situation. I ranted about how unfair it was that this charge fell in a new billing year and with a new company. I complained about the outrageous cost of health care in general and these lab charges in particular. I swore and took God's name in vain. Then I broke down sobbing that there was no way we would be able to pay the entire amount of the bill (because a new insurance company wasn't going to understand, wouldn't care, and wouldn't pay for what they probably thought were just some random, out-of-the blue tests that M had done for the heck of it). And finally I wailed that because of all of the above, we were going to be broke and penniless.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
must. have. chocolate.
I have had some serious chocolate cravings lately. Sadly, I haven't had any chocolate in the house, except for chocolate chips. For some reason I decided to draw the line at chocolate chips. I'm not sure why because it's never stopped me before.
Last night I had to go to Target so I was on the lookout for some chocolate. Unbelievably, there was very little chocolate on sale.
What's up with that? Easter is less than two weeks away and the majority of the world seems to think that Easter is all about chocolate bunnies, so why are all the Easter basket treats full price? There must be some candy conspiracy just like the oil cartel's conspiracy with the big oil companies to gouge us all with outrageous gas prices. : /
Finally I found a bag of Hershey's Bliss, dark chocolate with caramel. They're similar to Dove candies in that they're a nice bite size square of chocolate, wrapped in foil. Mmmm, delicious.
Craving under control. : )
Last night I had to go to Target so I was on the lookout for some chocolate. Unbelievably, there was very little chocolate on sale.
What's up with that? Easter is less than two weeks away and the majority of the world seems to think that Easter is all about chocolate bunnies, so why are all the Easter basket treats full price? There must be some candy conspiracy just like the oil cartel's conspiracy with the big oil companies to gouge us all with outrageous gas prices. : /
Finally I found a bag of Hershey's Bliss, dark chocolate with caramel. They're similar to Dove candies in that they're a nice bite size square of chocolate, wrapped in foil. Mmmm, delicious.
Craving under control. : )
Monday, March 26, 2012
Music Monday
Because you can never have too much music . . . on Monday or any day.
Shine on stars.
Shining Star by The Manhattans (1980)
The choreography isn't the best, but those suits are super sharp!
AND
Shining Star by Earth, Wind & Fire (1975)
Shine on stars.
Shining Star by The Manhattans (1980)
The choreography isn't the best, but those suits are super sharp!
AND
Shining Star by Earth, Wind & Fire (1975)
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Saturday, March 24, 2012
You know you shop at Target too much when . . .
* Your father calls you on your cell phone, and instead of saying "hello" he asks, "Are you at Target?"
* The cashiers and Guest Services employees say, "It's good to see you again" and "Weren't you just here yesterday?"
* You are able to help customers find what they're looking for when the floor employees don't have a clue.
* The cash register spits out a bazillion coupons for items that you buy regularly.
* Everyone wonders why you don't work at Target.
* The cashiers and Guest Services employees say, "It's good to see you again" and "Weren't you just here yesterday?"
* You are able to help customers find what they're looking for when the floor employees don't have a clue.
* The cash register spits out a bazillion coupons for items that you buy regularly.
* Everyone wonders why you don't work at Target.
Friday, March 23, 2012
Unrealistic expectations
Friday is Bride Day on TLC. Almost every Friday night I watch at least one of these shows: Say Yes to the Dress, Say Yes to the Dress: Atlanta, Four Weddings, or My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. If M is home, she usually watches the shows with me. And therein lies the problem.
I'm afraid these reality wedding shows are setting M up for unrealistic expectations when (if ) the day comes for her to shop for and choose a wedding gown. The lowest budget any of the television brides have for their dream dress is $2000. I know right now that there will be no $2000 dress when M gets married. I doubt if there will be a $1000 dress.
When E was married, almost 5 years ago, we really lucked out. She found her wedding gown at a bridal store that was going out of business. When she first tried on her dress, it was marked 30% off. It was a beautiful dress, but this was also the very first time E had looked at wedding gowns; naturally she wanted to try on more dresses. After looking at two other salons and not finding anything, we decided to go back to the first store. The gown she loved was still there and now it was 50% off. Because it was so reasonably priced, even at full price, I told E we should go ahead and buy it -- if she found something else in the next few weeks, we could always sell this dress at a consignment shop. As it turned out, E loved the dress so much that she never wanted to look for a different gown.
It was all so easy . . . too easy. There was no battle over price, no pouting, no endless trips from store to store to store. From start to finish, the experience took two days. E tried on the dress one day, then went back the next day to try it on again. Once she made her decision, I paid for the dress and we took it home with us. No special order, no waiting, no fittings or alterations. Just buy it, bag it, and load it in the car.
Does lightning ever strike twice? There is no way I can possibly be that fortunate a second time. : /
I'm afraid these reality wedding shows are setting M up for unrealistic expectations when (if ) the day comes for her to shop for and choose a wedding gown. The lowest budget any of the television brides have for their dream dress is $2000. I know right now that there will be no $2000 dress when M gets married. I doubt if there will be a $1000 dress.
When E was married, almost 5 years ago, we really lucked out. She found her wedding gown at a bridal store that was going out of business. When she first tried on her dress, it was marked 30% off. It was a beautiful dress, but this was also the very first time E had looked at wedding gowns; naturally she wanted to try on more dresses. After looking at two other salons and not finding anything, we decided to go back to the first store. The gown she loved was still there and now it was 50% off. Because it was so reasonably priced, even at full price, I told E we should go ahead and buy it -- if she found something else in the next few weeks, we could always sell this dress at a consignment shop. As it turned out, E loved the dress so much that she never wanted to look for a different gown.
It was all so easy . . . too easy. There was no battle over price, no pouting, no endless trips from store to store to store. From start to finish, the experience took two days. E tried on the dress one day, then went back the next day to try it on again. Once she made her decision, I paid for the dress and we took it home with us. No special order, no waiting, no fittings or alterations. Just buy it, bag it, and load it in the car.
Does lightning ever strike twice? There is no way I can possibly be that fortunate a second time. : /
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Thankful Thursday
I don't really like rain.
I don't like the mess -- puddles and mud, wet pant hems and dingy, oily water kicked up on the back of my legs -- it all drives me crazy.
Additionally, I live in a house without air conditioning, so rain and warm weather create an icky, humid mash-up. Bath towels take forever to dry and even the rugs and carpet feel damp and sticky. Ugh. Air conditioning helps to take the humidity out of the atmosphere, but fans, ceiling or otherwise, don't even come close. : /
It rained this evening and it was glorious! The rain cut through the oppressive heat that has held us captive for the past nine days. Instead of a downpour, we were treated to a heavy drizzle with no wind. I needed to run errands this evening, and I didn't even mind being out in the rain. In fact, I actually enjoyed the feel of raindrops on my face and hands.
So tonight, I am thankful for a gentle spring rain. It has been quite awhile since we had a decent rain. The grass, flowers, bushes, and trees really needed the refreshing drink that this rain brought. Tomorrow the landscape will be more green, more lush, and more fragrant because of the welcome pitter patter of precipitation.
I don't like the mess -- puddles and mud, wet pant hems and dingy, oily water kicked up on the back of my legs -- it all drives me crazy.
Additionally, I live in a house without air conditioning, so rain and warm weather create an icky, humid mash-up. Bath towels take forever to dry and even the rugs and carpet feel damp and sticky. Ugh. Air conditioning helps to take the humidity out of the atmosphere, but fans, ceiling or otherwise, don't even come close. : /
It rained this evening and it was glorious! The rain cut through the oppressive heat that has held us captive for the past nine days. Instead of a downpour, we were treated to a heavy drizzle with no wind. I needed to run errands this evening, and I didn't even mind being out in the rain. In fact, I actually enjoyed the feel of raindrops on my face and hands.
So tonight, I am thankful for a gentle spring rain. It has been quite awhile since we had a decent rain. The grass, flowers, bushes, and trees really needed the refreshing drink that this rain brought. Tomorrow the landscape will be more green, more lush, and more fragrant because of the welcome pitter patter of precipitation.
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Too much of a good thing is too much
Is it really just the second day of spring?
The high today was 87 degrees, a new record high for this date. Today was also the seventh day in a row of temperatures at or above 80 degrees.
It's March people . . . what is going on???
So far this month we have had eight consecutive days of record-setting high temperatures.
This is madness, a new kind of March Madness, and I know I'm not the only one who would still prefer some chill in my nights and a gradual warm-up before the sizzle of summer.
This part of the upper midwest is known for having four distinct seasons. I hope this year I won't be gypped out of the softness and beauty of spring.
The high today was 87 degrees, a new record high for this date. Today was also the seventh day in a row of temperatures at or above 80 degrees.
It's March people . . . what is going on???
So far this month we have had eight consecutive days of record-setting high temperatures.
This is madness, a new kind of March Madness, and I know I'm not the only one who would still prefer some chill in my nights and a gradual warm-up before the sizzle of summer.
This part of the upper midwest is known for having four distinct seasons. I hope this year I won't be gypped out of the softness and beauty of spring.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
What a difference five days make
When I left for Decatur on Thursday, there wasn't a whole lot of green in Carol Stream -- no green lawns, no green leaves on trees or bushes. There were a few crocuses and other early spring plants starting to poke through the ground, but mostly the landscape was fairly brown.
What a difference five days of record-breaking temperature and sunshine can make! When I came home today I was greeted by green lawns, budding and flowering trees and bushes, even tulips and daffodils. The transformation was dramatic.
Because Decatur is situated three hours south of Chicago, their growing season is usually two weeks ahead of us. This year the widespread unseasonably warm temperatures seem to have leveled the gardening field. : )
Today was the first day of spring. The official temperature in Chicago was 85 degrees. Chicago was warmer than Orlando, Miami, Los Angelos, Phoenix, and Las Vegas. In fact, Chicago was the warmest city in the continental United States today.
A lot of people feel that we're in for a rude awakening when the "abnormally" warm weather subsides and "normal" weather reappears. We'll see. For now I'm going to enjoy what Mother Nature is sending our way.
What a difference five days of record-breaking temperature and sunshine can make! When I came home today I was greeted by green lawns, budding and flowering trees and bushes, even tulips and daffodils. The transformation was dramatic.
Because Decatur is situated three hours south of Chicago, their growing season is usually two weeks ahead of us. This year the widespread unseasonably warm temperatures seem to have leveled the gardening field. : )
Today was the first day of spring. The official temperature in Chicago was 85 degrees. Chicago was warmer than Orlando, Miami, Los Angelos, Phoenix, and Las Vegas. In fact, Chicago was the warmest city in the continental United States today.
A lot of people feel that we're in for a rude awakening when the "abnormally" warm weather subsides and "normal" weather reappears. We'll see. For now I'm going to enjoy what Mother Nature is sending our way.
Tuesday's Tune
I missed Music Monday (traveling without access to a computer) so for one time only, welcome to Tuesday's Tune!
This song may be a day late, but it is definitely worth the wait. Mellow out to some great psychedelic soul from the 70's. If I was into pot when I was in college (not that I ever smoked pot before or after college either) this song would definitely have been my go-to "get high" music.
On August 6, 1977, Strawberry Letter 23 by the Brothers Johnson was #1 on Billboard's Hot Soul Singles. It was displaced a week later by another Music Monday selection, Float On -- just a little 70's soul trivia. : )
This song may be a day late, but it is definitely worth the wait. Mellow out to some great psychedelic soul from the 70's. If I was into pot when I was in college (not that I ever smoked pot before or after college either) this song would definitely have been my go-to "get high" music.
On August 6, 1977, Strawberry Letter 23 by the Brothers Johnson was #1 on Billboard's Hot Soul Singles. It was displaced a week later by another Music Monday selection, Float On -- just a little 70's soul trivia. : )
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Always be prepared
For most people, the words "be prepared" probably bring to mind the Boy Scout and Girl Scout mottos.
When I hear "be prepared" I think of 1 Peter 3:15.
"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,"
Another "prepared" phrase is "prepare to meet your maker." I think everyone knows what that means, but last Wednesday, for a group of women in my Bible study, the concept of preparation soared to another level.
Last week Wheaton College was on spring break, so Bible study also went on spring break. The morning study utilizes a lot of students to staff the childcare and programs for infants and kids up to kindergarten age. So without Kids Korner workers (hate, hate, hate the forced alliterative spelling of korner!) the morning study is unable to meet and the evening study forgoes meeting as well so that we all are able to stay on the same lesson schedule.
With a week off, the small groups are encouraged to get together for small group fellowship. Both of my group leaders were going to be out of town, so my group did not meet, but all of the other groups did. I'm sure they were blessed with a time of sharing and prayer, but one group experienced something that went beyond anyone's expectations.
R and P's group met at R's house. During the course of the evening, an older woman, J, collapsed and died.
Died. Dead.
Who could ever have anticipated that one of the group members wouldn't return to her home at the end of the evening, but instead would go home to be with the Lord? No one in R and P's group was prepared for that scenario, but the only one who really needed to be prepared was J.
J had attended Women's Bible Study for many years. For some reason (I don't know the details) she was estranged from her family. But by the grace of God, year after year, she was always in a group with the same women. As a result, her sisters in Christ were the family that loved and cared for her, who brought her to church on Wednesday evenings, who helped her navigate with her walker, and who were by her side when she passed from the joys and trials of this world into the everlasting glory of heaven.
I hope that J's years of studying God's Word prepared her to share her faith with others. I also hope that Bible study prepared her to face disappointment and loss, while at the same time encouraging her and deepening her faith. But most importantly, I hope that the Word of God prepared J to stand before the Father, clothed in the righteousness that comes by virtue of faith alone in Jesus Christ.
When I hear "be prepared" I think of 1 Peter 3:15.
"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,"
Another "prepared" phrase is "prepare to meet your maker." I think everyone knows what that means, but last Wednesday, for a group of women in my Bible study, the concept of preparation soared to another level.
Last week Wheaton College was on spring break, so Bible study also went on spring break. The morning study utilizes a lot of students to staff the childcare and programs for infants and kids up to kindergarten age. So without Kids Korner workers (hate, hate, hate the forced alliterative spelling of korner!) the morning study is unable to meet and the evening study forgoes meeting as well so that we all are able to stay on the same lesson schedule.
With a week off, the small groups are encouraged to get together for small group fellowship. Both of my group leaders were going to be out of town, so my group did not meet, but all of the other groups did. I'm sure they were blessed with a time of sharing and prayer, but one group experienced something that went beyond anyone's expectations.
R and P's group met at R's house. During the course of the evening, an older woman, J, collapsed and died.
Died. Dead.
Who could ever have anticipated that one of the group members wouldn't return to her home at the end of the evening, but instead would go home to be with the Lord? No one in R and P's group was prepared for that scenario, but the only one who really needed to be prepared was J.
J had attended Women's Bible Study for many years. For some reason (I don't know the details) she was estranged from her family. But by the grace of God, year after year, she was always in a group with the same women. As a result, her sisters in Christ were the family that loved and cared for her, who brought her to church on Wednesday evenings, who helped her navigate with her walker, and who were by her side when she passed from the joys and trials of this world into the everlasting glory of heaven.
I hope that J's years of studying God's Word prepared her to share her faith with others. I also hope that Bible study prepared her to face disappointment and loss, while at the same time encouraging her and deepening her faith. But most importantly, I hope that the Word of God prepared J to stand before the Father, clothed in the righteousness that comes by virtue of faith alone in Jesus Christ.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Too much of a good thing
I ate out today. Twice.
I treated a friend to a birthday lunch at the restaurant of her choice. She chose Smashburger. I love Smashburger and I hadn't been there in a long time. Unfortunately my husband and I had already made plans to have dinner at Culver's to support the local high school with their post prom fundraiser.
Yeesh. Just the other day I heard on the news that ideally red meat consumption should be limited to no more than two times per week. Here I am, eating red meat twice in one day. Over the course of a month, I rarely eat red meat, especially since G is a pescatarian/ovo-lacto vegetarian. In light of the media blitz about the perils of beef, the timing of my red meat overload was hilarious.
So, I had a BBQ Bacon Cheddar burger at Smashburger and a grilled reuben at Culver's. Both were delicious. I should be good with red meat for awhile . . . except that at the end of the week I'm spending a few days with my parents at their home, also known as red meat heaven.
Maybe I can convince my mom to make grilled chicken. : )
I treated a friend to a birthday lunch at the restaurant of her choice. She chose Smashburger. I love Smashburger and I hadn't been there in a long time. Unfortunately my husband and I had already made plans to have dinner at Culver's to support the local high school with their post prom fundraiser.
Yeesh. Just the other day I heard on the news that ideally red meat consumption should be limited to no more than two times per week. Here I am, eating red meat twice in one day. Over the course of a month, I rarely eat red meat, especially since G is a pescatarian/ovo-lacto vegetarian. In light of the media blitz about the perils of beef, the timing of my red meat overload was hilarious.
So, I had a BBQ Bacon Cheddar burger at Smashburger and a grilled reuben at Culver's. Both were delicious. I should be good with red meat for awhile . . . except that at the end of the week I'm spending a few days with my parents at their home, also known as red meat heaven.
Maybe I can convince my mom to make grilled chicken. : )
Monday, March 12, 2012
Music Monday
No Motown today. Nope, this is pure Philadelphia soul . . . sex set to music.
Seriously, this is major make-out music. Although when this song debuted I was too young to make-out. I knew what making-out was, but it would be a few years before I had that experience.
Enjoy the sensual strings and lush orchestration of Billy Paul's Me and Mrs. Jones.
Seriously, this is major make-out music. Although when this song debuted I was too young to make-out. I knew what making-out was, but it would be a few years before I had that experience.
Enjoy the sensual strings and lush orchestration of Billy Paul's Me and Mrs. Jones.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
A sad anniversary
Today is the one-year anniversary of the devastating Tohoku earthquake and tsunami in Japan.
It's hard to believe that a year has passed. As is so often the case, it feels as if this disaster happened years ago and also just a few months ago. Gauging the passage of time is such a tricky task, especially as I grow older. : /
Yesterday I watched a show about cat cafes in Japan. What a cute concept! The show's host also visited an American couple who used to teach English as a Second Language. Now they run a cat shelter located in a safe area, but not far from the radiation zones that have resulted from the earthquake and tsunami damage at the Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Plant. About once a week, the woman enters the radiation zone and takes food to the cats that are still living there, most of them pets that had to be left beyond when their owners were forced to flee. The shelter owners have been able to bring a few cats out and assimilate them into the shelter, but many cats are too sick or too fearful to make the transition.
A year has passed, but many people, pets, livestock, and other animals are still suffering the economic and emotional aftershocks.
It's hard to believe that a year has passed. As is so often the case, it feels as if this disaster happened years ago and also just a few months ago. Gauging the passage of time is such a tricky task, especially as I grow older. : /
Yesterday I watched a show about cat cafes in Japan. What a cute concept! The show's host also visited an American couple who used to teach English as a Second Language. Now they run a cat shelter located in a safe area, but not far from the radiation zones that have resulted from the earthquake and tsunami damage at the Fukushima Daiichi Nuclear Power Plant. About once a week, the woman enters the radiation zone and takes food to the cats that are still living there, most of them pets that had to be left beyond when their owners were forced to flee. The shelter owners have been able to bring a few cats out and assimilate them into the shelter, but many cats are too sick or too fearful to make the transition.
A year has passed, but many people, pets, livestock, and other animals are still suffering the economic and emotional aftershocks.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Lookin' for love in all the wrong places
This country classic was recorded by Johnny Lee, but somehow in my mind I associate it with George Strait.
Today I associated it with me. I was looking for love in all the wrong places. And if I'm honest, I've done the same thing not just today, but lots and lots of days for too many years to count.
So in a futile attempt to find love (or comfort or satisfaction [in the sense of being emotionally filled] or a feeling of being needed and appreciated) I left the house for eight hours.
I went to Barnes & Noble and bought a Starbucks mocha and a slice of chocolate cheesecake. I had this same cheesecake last weekend and it was delicious. This weekend it was just okay. In fact I really didn't even want to finish the whole piece -- it just didn't taste all that great. To be more specific, it tasted just fine, but I didn't find it to be satisfying. It didn't feed the "hunger" that I was experiencing.
I took my B&N treat to my friend K's house because I need to check on her cat, Booker, while she's gone for the weekend. I love her cat. He is beautiful and soft. When I first walk in the door, he's glad to see me because he knows I'm going to give him fresh water and more cat food. After I've fed him and start up the basement stairs, Booker races ahead of me and stops at the curve of the landing. I know what he wants me to do. He plants himself right in the middle of the large step and waits for me to lavish him with love. I am happy to oblige. Unfortunately, Booker isn't as eager to return the favor. In all the time I've known him (almost 5 years) he's only let me pick him up and hold him twice and he has never sat on my lap. So while I enjoyed being with Booker this afternoon, I really didn't get any love in return.
Before I went home, I needed to stop at Target to get bread and bananas. Instead I went to T.J. Maxx. I love to shop and T.J.'s is one of my favorite places. It had been a while since I'd been there, so there was a lot to look at. If only all I'd done was look. But no, I bought things . . . lots of things. Most of what I bought was for E, K, and M. I found work out clothes and also some tops they can wear to school or work. Sometimes I think I'm trying to buy my children's love. Other times I realize that buying things makes me feel happy -- in a way that I don't find happiness in other areas of my life.
I know it's wrong to try to fill the emptiness in my life with material goods, especially ones that I can't really afford. Most of the time I'm able to resist the urge to spend money I don't have on things that I (and my kids) don't really need. But sometimes the emptiness and desire to feel happiness and be "loved" is so great that I give in.
I'm looking forward to the day when I won't ever find myself lookin' for love in all the wrong places.
Today I associated it with me. I was looking for love in all the wrong places. And if I'm honest, I've done the same thing not just today, but lots and lots of days for too many years to count.
So in a futile attempt to find love (or comfort or satisfaction [in the sense of being emotionally filled] or a feeling of being needed and appreciated) I left the house for eight hours.
I went to Barnes & Noble and bought a Starbucks mocha and a slice of chocolate cheesecake. I had this same cheesecake last weekend and it was delicious. This weekend it was just okay. In fact I really didn't even want to finish the whole piece -- it just didn't taste all that great. To be more specific, it tasted just fine, but I didn't find it to be satisfying. It didn't feed the "hunger" that I was experiencing.
I took my B&N treat to my friend K's house because I need to check on her cat, Booker, while she's gone for the weekend. I love her cat. He is beautiful and soft. When I first walk in the door, he's glad to see me because he knows I'm going to give him fresh water and more cat food. After I've fed him and start up the basement stairs, Booker races ahead of me and stops at the curve of the landing. I know what he wants me to do. He plants himself right in the middle of the large step and waits for me to lavish him with love. I am happy to oblige. Unfortunately, Booker isn't as eager to return the favor. In all the time I've known him (almost 5 years) he's only let me pick him up and hold him twice and he has never sat on my lap. So while I enjoyed being with Booker this afternoon, I really didn't get any love in return.
Before I went home, I needed to stop at Target to get bread and bananas. Instead I went to T.J. Maxx. I love to shop and T.J.'s is one of my favorite places. It had been a while since I'd been there, so there was a lot to look at. If only all I'd done was look. But no, I bought things . . . lots of things. Most of what I bought was for E, K, and M. I found work out clothes and also some tops they can wear to school or work. Sometimes I think I'm trying to buy my children's love. Other times I realize that buying things makes me feel happy -- in a way that I don't find happiness in other areas of my life.
I know it's wrong to try to fill the emptiness in my life with material goods, especially ones that I can't really afford. Most of the time I'm able to resist the urge to spend money I don't have on things that I (and my kids) don't really need. But sometimes the emptiness and desire to feel happiness and be "loved" is so great that I give in.
I'm looking forward to the day when I won't ever find myself lookin' for love in all the wrong places.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Gone South
I've lived my whole life north of the Mason-Dixon Line, but at this moment, two of my kids are south of it.
M is in Clemson, SC for spring break training for crew. She left Purdue at 2:00 a.m. and after surviving a bus breakdown, she finally arrived there late this afternoon. She won't be back on campus until sometime on Sunday, March 18.
E and N left West Lafayette at 11:00 a.m. and they arrived in Salem, VA also late this afternoon. They are going to check out a house for rent and also look at apartments in the Salem/Blacksburg area. Additionally, they're hoping to do some hiking and get a feel for what life in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia will be like. Before they know it, they'll be on the road and heading back to work and school responsibilities on Tuesday.
I hope everyone has a good time and safe travels. It's hard for me when my kids are so far away, but I guess I'd better get used to it. June is just a few months off and then we'll be helping E and N to load up a moving truck and settle into their new home in Virginia. M should graduate next May (2013) and she's planning on going to graduate school -- there's no guarantee that she will stay in the midwest.
Life goes on and change happens. At the very least I should have fun places to visit. : )
M is in Clemson, SC for spring break training for crew. She left Purdue at 2:00 a.m. and after surviving a bus breakdown, she finally arrived there late this afternoon. She won't be back on campus until sometime on Sunday, March 18.
E and N left West Lafayette at 11:00 a.m. and they arrived in Salem, VA also late this afternoon. They are going to check out a house for rent and also look at apartments in the Salem/Blacksburg area. Additionally, they're hoping to do some hiking and get a feel for what life in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia will be like. Before they know it, they'll be on the road and heading back to work and school responsibilities on Tuesday.
I hope everyone has a good time and safe travels. It's hard for me when my kids are so far away, but I guess I'd better get used to it. June is just a few months off and then we'll be helping E and N to load up a moving truck and settle into their new home in Virginia. M should graduate next May (2013) and she's planning on going to graduate school -- there's no guarantee that she will stay in the midwest.
Life goes on and change happens. At the very least I should have fun places to visit. : )
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Thankful Thursday
It's a boy!
The baby from baby shower #1 was born on Monday (a week late). He was 7 lbs, 8 oz and almost 21" long. According to the e-mail I received "mom, dad, and baby are doing well." : )
I am thankful that little SJ has arrived safely. I wish I could tell you his name, but I have a no names policy with my own family, so I definitely wouldn't want to use the name of non-family members who haven't given permission for me to use/share their names. You will have to trust me that SJ's name pays homage to two godly Biblical men.
I pray that as SJ grows, he will come to know and love Jesus. May his life and character reflect not only the Biblical men who inspired his name, but also the love, grace, and mercy of Christ Jesus.
The baby from baby shower #1 was born on Monday (a week late). He was 7 lbs, 8 oz and almost 21" long. According to the e-mail I received "mom, dad, and baby are doing well." : )
I am thankful that little SJ has arrived safely. I wish I could tell you his name, but I have a no names policy with my own family, so I definitely wouldn't want to use the name of non-family members who haven't given permission for me to use/share their names. You will have to trust me that SJ's name pays homage to two godly Biblical men.
I pray that as SJ grows, he will come to know and love Jesus. May his life and character reflect not only the Biblical men who inspired his name, but also the love, grace, and mercy of Christ Jesus.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
One of the saddest things
One of the saddest things for me?
When I go to my facebook page and see both my daughter and her ex-boyfriend's photos displayed, one on top of the other, on the left side of my page under the "Friends" heading.
It's been two years now since M and T broke up and it still breaks my heart every time I think of the hurt they caused each other.
M always said, "I'm going to marry him" and I would downplay the remark by telling her she was only 16 (or 17 or 18) and that a lot could happen before she was ready to get married. But secretly I hoped and believed that T could very well be her future husband. I think I wanted M to avoid the pitfalls of dating lots of guys to find "the one," but I also loved T (still do) and hoped that the first boy M gave her heart to could also be the one man who would love her forever.
I wish we all could go back in time and relive those months from the last half of 2009 until the spring of 2010 and find a way for M and T to make their relationship survive and thrive despite the challenge of attending different colleges.
I wish T was still in M's life, still the love of her life.
I wish she was still telling me, "I'm going to marry him."
When I go to my facebook page and see both my daughter and her ex-boyfriend's photos displayed, one on top of the other, on the left side of my page under the "Friends" heading.
It's been two years now since M and T broke up and it still breaks my heart every time I think of the hurt they caused each other.
M always said, "I'm going to marry him" and I would downplay the remark by telling her she was only 16 (or 17 or 18) and that a lot could happen before she was ready to get married. But secretly I hoped and believed that T could very well be her future husband. I think I wanted M to avoid the pitfalls of dating lots of guys to find "the one," but I also loved T (still do) and hoped that the first boy M gave her heart to could also be the one man who would love her forever.
I wish we all could go back in time and relive those months from the last half of 2009 until the spring of 2010 and find a way for M and T to make their relationship survive and thrive despite the challenge of attending different colleges.
I wish T was still in M's life, still the love of her life.
I wish she was still telling me, "I'm going to marry him."
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Confronting prejudice
Most of the time I can convince myself that I am a tolerant and accepting person. But as a child, the family and the part of the community that I associated with were definitely homogenous -- no non-Christians in my family, no black members in my church. With the exception of school, starting in sixth grade, everyone was just like me.
There were definitely undercurrents (and sometimes tidal waves) of racism, classism, and religious intolerance in my segregated existence. I can distinctly remember a remark I heard my father make when Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated and even then, at the age of not quite ten, I knew that what my father had said was hateful and wrong. Based on that and subsequent experiences, I decided that I wouldn't react the way my father and others had. I determined to ignore the remarks that denigrated others in a misguided attempt to elevate oneself, and I made an effort to meet and make friends with all sorts of people.
And for quite some time, I thought I had been successful . . . until circumstances and situations showed me that I was wrong.
Slowly I realized that, in my heart, I wasn't really a tolerant or accepting person. I did consider myself superior to someone who hadn't graduated from high school, let alone graduated magna cum laude from a university. When my then third grade daughter told me that she "liked" two boys in her class, one black and one Hispanic, I wasn't thrilled.
There were definitely undercurrents (and sometimes tidal waves) of racism, classism, and religious intolerance in my segregated existence. I can distinctly remember a remark I heard my father make when Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated and even then, at the age of not quite ten, I knew that what my father had said was hateful and wrong. Based on that and subsequent experiences, I decided that I wouldn't react the way my father and others had. I determined to ignore the remarks that denigrated others in a misguided attempt to elevate oneself, and I made an effort to meet and make friends with all sorts of people.
And for quite some time, I thought I had been successful . . . until circumstances and situations showed me that I was wrong.
Slowly I realized that, in my heart, I wasn't really a tolerant or accepting person. I did consider myself superior to someone who hadn't graduated from high school, let alone graduated magna cum laude from a university. When my then third grade daughter told me that she "liked" two boys in her class, one black and one Hispanic, I wasn't thrilled.
Monday, March 5, 2012
Music Monday
I've just realized that I should have named my Monday feature Motown Monday, since that's pretty much what I've posted so far. I do love Motown music. : )
Today's song isn't actually Motown, but it's has a similar smoothness and vibe.
Today's song isn't actually Motown, but it's has a similar smoothness and vibe.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Reality sets in
It's been more than a week since E and N learned that they would be moving to Salem, Virginia and the reality is beginning to set in for me. While I'm very happy for them and very grateful that they won't be moving all the way to Seattle, I am sad that Salem is so very far away from Chicago, Decatur, West Lafayette, and Holland, Michigan.
We have been so fortunate to have E no more than three hours away from us since she graduated from high school. After she graduated with her bachelors degree, she could potentially have gone to graduate school in: Lincoln, Nebraska; Charlottesville, Virginia; Syracuse, New York; Mount Pleasant, Michigan or Athens, Georgia. We felt blessed that she and N decided to go to Purdue -- close to us, close to N's parents, and close to grandparents and other extended family.
Now the time has come for E and N to move farther away, and I'm struggling a little with the reality that I won't be able to hop in the car and visit with my kids and Penny whenever I want. The logistics of a 12 hour car trip require more than spur of the moment desire. I know that I'm not capable of driving for that long by myself, so most likely G will need to be willing to come with me if I'm going to be able to visit with them in their new home.
The big move is still a few months away, so I really shouldn't be thinking/worrying about this yet . . . but it has been weighing on my mind. I need to intentionally commit the whole situation to prayer and trust that God, just as He did with the internship, will work it all out for our benefit and His glory.
We have been so fortunate to have E no more than three hours away from us since she graduated from high school. After she graduated with her bachelors degree, she could potentially have gone to graduate school in: Lincoln, Nebraska; Charlottesville, Virginia; Syracuse, New York; Mount Pleasant, Michigan or Athens, Georgia. We felt blessed that she and N decided to go to Purdue -- close to us, close to N's parents, and close to grandparents and other extended family.
Now the time has come for E and N to move farther away, and I'm struggling a little with the reality that I won't be able to hop in the car and visit with my kids and Penny whenever I want. The logistics of a 12 hour car trip require more than spur of the moment desire. I know that I'm not capable of driving for that long by myself, so most likely G will need to be willing to come with me if I'm going to be able to visit with them in their new home.
The big move is still a few months away, so I really shouldn't be thinking/worrying about this yet . . . but it has been weighing on my mind. I need to intentionally commit the whole situation to prayer and trust that God, just as He did with the internship, will work it all out for our benefit and His glory.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Friday, March 2, 2012
The power of a sandwich
Who doesn't like a sandwich? Good bread, yummy fillings, cold, grilled or toasted -- it's all good. Not only can a sandwich satisfy your hunger and fill you up, it can change your life.
Whaaat? How can a sandwich change your life? What kind of sandwich would that be?
Well actually two kinds of sandwiches can be transformational if they're made the right way and served with love.
Whaaat? How can a sandwich change your life? What kind of sandwich would that be?
Well actually two kinds of sandwiches can be transformational if they're made the right way and served with love.
Thankful Thursday -- losing it
For some unknown reason, all week long I have been one day ahead. So in my mind, today was Friday, not Thursday.
For the second time in the past thirty days, I forgot it was Thankful Thursday. What is wrong with me?
In Bible study we have been studying some of the minor prophets and recently we spent two weeks studying Hosea. This book of the Bible is all about God's love and mercy for His spiritually adulterous people. Even though Israel has turned away and prostituted themselves with other gods, the Lord God loves them and desires for them to confess their sin and repent; He wants to show them His mercy.
I am eternally grateful for God's mercy in my life -- the forgiveness he extends to me when I really deserve His wrath. God's immeasurable mercy and Christ's willing sacrifice on the cross for my sins enable me to be welcomed into my forever family as a child of God. What could be better than that? : )
For the second time in the past thirty days, I forgot it was Thankful Thursday. What is wrong with me?
In Bible study we have been studying some of the minor prophets and recently we spent two weeks studying Hosea. This book of the Bible is all about God's love and mercy for His spiritually adulterous people. Even though Israel has turned away and prostituted themselves with other gods, the Lord God loves them and desires for them to confess their sin and repent; He wants to show them His mercy.
I am eternally grateful for God's mercy in my life -- the forgiveness he extends to me when I really deserve His wrath. God's immeasurable mercy and Christ's willing sacrifice on the cross for my sins enable me to be welcomed into my forever family as a child of God. What could be better than that? : )
Thursday, March 1, 2012
How about a Labrador?
The big question for today is -- Did March come in like a lion or a lamb?
Unlike yesterday, which was both a lamb (early part of the day) and lion (late afternoon into evening), today was somewhere in between.
So maybe that means it was a Labrador retriever? : )
Unlike yesterday, which was both a lamb (early part of the day) and lion (late afternoon into evening), today was somewhere in between.
So maybe that means it was a Labrador retriever? : )
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