I heard it on the radio

I should probably have a regular feature called I heard it on the radio.  It seems like I've written a fair number of posts about topics or comments I've heard on Moody Radio and there have been lots more I could have written about but didn't.

Today I heard two things that resonated with me and my circumstances.  The first one was actually pretty shocking.  I wish I had caught this guy's name because what he had to say was unlike anything I had ever heard on Moody before.  I almost expected a deep announcer's voice to break into the broadcast and give the standard disclaimer "The views expressed here are those of the speaker and do not necessarily reflect the views of this station."

The speaker was talking about marriage relationships, specifically long-term marriages of 30 years or more.  He said that it was NORMAL for people to not always be in love with their spouse.  I don't think this man was talking about being peeved with your husband because he forgot to put the toilet seat down . . . again.  I got the distinct impression that he meant truly not having loving feelings toward one's husband or wife for a prolonged period of time.

I cannot begin to tell you the relief I felt when I heard the speaker describe my feelings (or lack thereof) as normal.  I'm not naive or stupid enough to think that all married couples that aren't on the brink of divorce, or contemplating it, are happily, blissfully in love with each other, but I had sort of assumed that my periodic apathy was peculiar to me.  Apparently there are other people, lots of people, who have had the same experience.

The second thing I heard piggybacks onto the first.  Pastor James Ford, Jr. was talking about people who want something that they're not prepared to handle.  He used the example of someone who really wants and can afford to buy a huge house, but hasn't thought the matter through carefully enough to make sure they'll be able to afford the increased utilities, insurance, and taxes.  Pastor Ford cautioned that a person may have what it takes to get into it, but does he/she have what it takes to maintain it?

I wasn't able to listen to the rest of the broadcast, so I'm not sure how Pastor Ford tied his statement and example to the rest of the message, but I was able to make an application based on my own life that connected with the program I had heard earlier.

For me, the statement described the approach many people take towards love and marriage.  They have enough love to enter into a marriage, but it's debatable if they have enough commitment to maintain the marriage, especially if their love wanes or situations and circumstances change.

G and I haven't always often properly approached and dealt with issues in our marriage.  But I feel that there is one thing that we have done right.  From the very beginning we determined that the commitment we made to one another on our wedding day was a lifelong commitment and we agreed that the word divorce would not be part of our relationship vocabulary.  That certainly doesn't mean that there haven't been times that I've entertained the idea of divorce.  I can't speak for G, but I'm pretty sure that the thought has crossed his mind once or twice -- I am not an easy person to live with.  : /  Thankfully we have been able, by the grace of God and belief in His Word, to continue to honor the vows that we made almost 32 years ago.

Even if there have been times when our love has been on life support, we've stood firm against taking the easy (and wrong) way out.  When we got married, G and I had enough love to commit to one another and begin our life together.  And years later we have enough love to maintain what we started.