Yesterday I had lunch with a friend that I've known for more than twenty years. I thought for sure she would notice my highlights.
Nope. If she did notice anything different, she didn't mention it.
So now I'm second guessing myself. Did I make a disastrous mistake? Does my hair look like "you know what?" -- remember, I gave up swearing for Lent. Are my husband and friends afraid to bring up the subject because their moms drummed into them the old adage "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all?"
I don't think my hair looks hideous. I'm still happy with it, although I wish some of the highlights were less yellow and a little more of a caramel color. If I get them done again, I can probably ask Candace to make some adjustments.
Then it occurred to me -- maybe my friends aren't as observant as I thought they were. Maybe they don't really look at me.
That last thought has made me wonder -- do I really look at people? Do I look at them when they are talking to me? Do I really pay attention to what they're saying, their tone of voice, their facial expressions?
If one of my friends changed her hairstyle or started wearing colored contacts or more importantly, if she was really hurting, but trying to not show it -- would I notice? Or would I be too busy trying to talk about me?
This whole experience started out being all about me, but over the course of the week, my perspective shifted and I began to consider my own actions and responses in my relationships with the people with whom I'm closest. As a result, I've been challenged to be more observant, focused and present in my conversations and interactions with my family and friends.
In the end, it really doesn't matter that no one has noticed my hair. This week has highlighted a way for me to make some personal changes that I hope will still be a part of my life long after the highlights in my hair have faded.
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